...other dreams

"Of course" moments

2012-02-04T20:08:00.001-08:00

When reading the news, I often have "of course" moments, where my suspicions or misgivings or fears are confirmed, the worst turns out to happen or to be true, and I just say, "of course." The latest moments:

1. pRick Santorum insults gays YET AGAIN by saying that only straight marriages benefit society and are "an intrinsic good." OF COURSE. I knew it had been too long since this asshole spewed his hate. This is, after all, the guy who compared gay marriage to incest. I was so happy when he lost his Senate seat and his little family cried and cried and I laughed and laughed.

2. Former Chimpy crony Ari Fleischer has been helping the Susan G Komen foundation out, and then OF COURSE, SGK cuts off funding to Planned Parenthood. So what looked like a charity to help women ends up bowing to reich-wingers and anti-choice assholes.

3. Unemployment is down YET AGAIN, but repugs keep saying the economy sucks and don't believe what your eyes are seeing! OF COURSE, if Newtie (Nudie?) were in charge, all these stats would be dead on and unimpeachable FACT!

Court okays Bush's telecom spying

2011-12-30T20:04:00.000-08:00

So a federal appeals court has upheld immunity for the telecoms -- among them, AT&T and Verizon -- that helped the Bush administration spy on U.S. citizens without a warrant.

I guess it's still true what Nixon said: "When the President does it, that means it's not illegal."

Which, I guess, excuses Obama's administration too, right? After all, no one seems in any hurry to bring charges of murder for the civilians killed by our drone strikes in Pakistan; just like no one prosecuted Darth Cheney and Chimpy for the Iraqi civilians killed in that debacle.

I know I'll sleep better at night knowing that what Nixon (of all people) said is still true today.

It's a party! It's a lark!

2011-12-19T18:42:00.000-08:00

Come on along, kids! It's not too
late to whore for more publicity!

Hey, it's "still not too late for folks to jump in" to the presidential race, according to Mooselini Failin'.

It's staggering to see the flippancy with which she regards the office of the presidency of the United States -- as though it's a club or a field trip.

It's final: I'm writing in Kucinich

2011-10-30T19:14:00.000-07:00

Whether it's ordering drone attacks all over the Middle East and Pakistan and killing indiscriminately, or sending death squads to kill bin Laden, or keeping an attorney general who's possibly been caught perjuring himself in front of Congress -- Obama is doing nothing to earn my vote.

I realize that he's had to fight an uphill battle to do anything to help the economy or any of us 99%ers, thanks to a determined repug strategy to defeat pretty much every little thing Obama wants to do. They just want to make him look bad and keep the power in their own hands; I understand that.

But he's doing plenty all on his own to make me feel like maybe we SHOULD let a repug take over. This whole troop withdrawal thing is nothing but smoke and mirrors; he'll pull the fighting men and women out and send in the "advisors" and the "trainers" and every other contractor who wants to earn mad money for risking life and limb and blowing away a few random Iraqis. There's no way the Pentagon lets go of their little toys in the Middle East.

God knows the repugs are not going to do any better, as they have no ideas and no consideration for anyone but themselves. Still, it's hard to see how things could get much worse, as I commented on I Can't Believe It's Not a Democracy after reading GMB's comment about letting the repugs take this shit over for a while and see how they like it.

This idea intrigued me; think how little Mittens or (oh gees) Herman Cain (as if) could do to right this ship. It couldn't be any worse than the little that Obama's done, thanks to the repugs blocking his every move, could it?

So while I had been thinking that I would have to hold my nose and vote Obama, I'm starting to wonder if maybe I should just write in Kucinich (aka "waste" my vote) and be done with it.

The ecstacy and the agony

2011-10-21T21:26:00.000-07:00

With apologies to Irving Stone. But not to Charleton Heston, because he's a dick.
Though it's not a recent film, I only just watched Michael Moore's Capitalism: A Love Story. If you haven't seen it, I suggest you do; it's a sharp and insightful piece, and it reminded me of the beginnings of the financial crisis and how perfectly executed was the complete sellout of the American people by our government, leading up to the bailout in the waning days of Chimpy's administration. In light of what's happening now with the Occupy movement, this film is more relevant than ever.

Still, there's one section--on the uprising of the people that led to Obama's victory--that stirred memories of one of the happiest nights of my life, as well as brought up a bitter reflux of betrayal. Moore chronicled the almost complete buyout of Congress and the administration by Goldman-Sachs execs (Paulsen, Geithner), senators who got loans from Countrywide (Dodd) before they crashed and burned, the fear-mongering that forced the passing of the TARP bailout -- but a lot of those people stayed in Obama's cabinet. Obama, whose top campaign contributor was Goldman Sachs, ended up being their bitch -- the very thing we elected him NOT to do. I watched the joy on people's faces as they watched Obama's rise, and I remembered the many many many times Obama has furthered the Bush-Cheney administration's many corrupt aims.

As I said, Moore didn't spend too much time on Obama; at the time Moore was making the movie (2007-2008, released in 2009), Obama was just starting to gain traction as a man for change, a man who was http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.giffor the people -- in short, a http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifsocialist. I was glad Moore didn't spend much time making Obama into the savior of the people, or he would've had to make a whole other movie just to eat his words.

Watch this movie sometime; it'll remind you of just how corrupt most of Washington is and how it got that way.

P.S.--the movie also brings up the subject of companies purchasing life insurance policies on their employees and how they profit when those employees die. Check to see if your employer is on this list. Gotta tell you that I breathed a sigh of relief that my current employer isn't on the list.

Must-see TV

2011-09-22T17:34:00.000-07:00

Wilderness: “an area where the earth and its community of life are untrammeled by man, where man himself is a visitor who does not remain.” - The 1964 Wilderness Act

I just watched a program on our WPSU World station (a super-PBS station which rocks) called "Wilderness: The Great Debate." You can watch the entire video here. A point-counterpoint between everyone from Utah politicians to Robert Redford, the film documents the growing debate between environmentalists who want to preserve American wilderness as wilderness, and those whose main concerns appeared to be jobs, energy, and personal "rights." The emphasis was on the Colorado Plateau of the American West, mainly southern Utah's many wild areas.

Here's a nice summary from Utah's KUED, the creator of the film:

The core of the debate is reflected in the film’s open. “Is the West going to be reduced to just photos and films to show young people how it used to be, or are there going to be places where they can go and see the way it used to be, like wilderness and like national parks?” Redford asks. On the other hand, Mark Habbeshaw- Kane County Commissioner, says, “This is a war for rural people, for state and local sovereignty, to protect what little sovereignty we have left as a rural people; to protect our traditions, our culture[,] our ability to manage our lives with a diversified economy.”

It's an interesting film, and it gave me insight into the teabagger types with their "don't tread on me" flags, whining about how government is trying to take away their land and their rights by daring to attempt to preserve our beautiful natural places from their ATVs, their cattle, their oil rigs, and their development.

Of course you know I was yelling at the oil and coal industry types, the ranchers, the "rural people" who are "puttin' protein back into the economy and feedin' people, puttin' out bales o' hay, and takin' care o' God's creation" (also known as overgrazing, corporate-controlled ranching and farming, and CAFOs). But after it was all over, I decided to look at an image:The original image is from here. Even the areas discussed in the documentary are largely lit up or surrounded completely by cities. Development has overtaken almost every bit of land in this country. Perhaps the line in the film that hit me the most was the assertion from a Utah politician that politicians from New York and Illinois should "clean up their own states" before they try to tell people in Utah how they can handle their public lands issues.

My point is this: As this photograph illustrates, it's too late for people in New York and Illinois to deal with their own states, their own wilderness. It's gone. Gone. So, although it might cost some people their "sovereignty" or their family livelihoods or their economic prosperity, we have to choose the wilderness. We can either preserve our wilderness as it is, with no development and extremely limited access, or we can have an entire country that looks like this:This is the continent of Europe lit up at night. Teabaggers and pro-Amurka types are constantly railing against Europe over issues like public healthcare and other such "socialist" policies. Remember how repugs starting talking about "freedom fries" when the French pissed kick-ass Amurkans off by actually speaking against the first Iraq war?

Yes, Europe is filled with socialist pansies who basically know nothing. Yet, if we allow development wherever it is economically expedient, profitable, and desired by whoever decides such questions, we will end up looking like a version of Europe.

Of course, it would only be "a version," a pale version at that. Where Europe has the remains of civilization's beginnings -- Greek temples, Roman colliseums, and other architectural wonders -- our development in America doesn't look anything like that.

No, our development looks like this:

Europe's wilderness is pretty much gone, the victim of thousands of years of development. America's development began only a few hundred years ago, yet we hurry to plaster our sprawl and our footprint all over everything.

And the American West? The sweeping vistas of Utah, Montana, the Badlands? Forget it! Let's just fence it off and put cows on it, let ATV riders hotdog all over it, criss-cross it with networks of roads, put oil derricks and shale-oil fracking operations all over it, and focus on what the land can yield financially instead of what it gives to our souls and our imaginations.

"...what are you going to have left to develop if you don't preserve something, and also what are you going to preserve for the dignity and the stature of your country in terms of its heritage?” --Robert Redford

Today's random thoughts

2011-09-05T17:40:00.001-07:00

These days, my random thoughts are all questions. I'm pretty much out of answers anymore.

1. I recently received an Obama 2012 bumpersticker and plea for more money in the mail. I stared at the sticker for some time; then I threw it away. I've been trying to decide what I'm going to do on Election Day 2012; I'm pretty much decided I'm writing in a vote for Kucinich.

Regarding my faded old "Hope" sticker from the 2008 election: My car and I were rear-ended on June 30, and the bumper was destroyed. The resulting repairs solved my problem of how I was going to get rid of the old sticker; it's gone.

Whom will you vote for in 2012?

2. The unemployment rate at the height of the Great Depression was 24.9% in 1933. Our unemployment rate today is 9.1%. What does this mean? I'm really not sure. Part of me wants to say, "why do the media insist on calling this time the worst since the Great Depression? I mean, unemployment's only 9%." I remember when I was in California, I took a photo of a headline stating that the state's unemployment had reached 12%.

Still, despite the bleak jobs outlook (NPR does a story on the jobless almost every day), my situation is pretty good. The people I know who want work have work.

What's the situation where you are?

3. I have been really weepy and down lately, and I can't get out of it. Part of it is the rainy weather and the knowledge that our climate is changing and there's no telling how many formerly snowy days will, in the future, be rainy days. A bigger part is the fact that we're coming on the 10th anniversary of 9/11. I read a story earlier today that said, "most people who were glued to the news for days in 2001 now think only rarely about that horrifying day." Is that really true? Is it weird that I think about it every time I see an American flag? Every time I see a photo of Chimpy Bush or Darth Cheney? Every time I hear mention of the economy? Just today, I was listening to a story about unemployed people trying to find work and how the economy just hasn't been producing enough jobs since the crash of 2008 -- and I found myself muttering, "the economy hasn't been producing enough jobs since 9/11." But is that even true?

Are you feeling optimistic or pessimistic as we approach the anniversary of 9/11?

Your comments are appreciated.

True, False, or just ridiculous?

2011-09-01T19:14:00.001-07:00

I was just reading an amazing post on DCap's blog about how some idiots from a right-wing "think" tank want to abolish the National Weather Service.

Why, you ask?

Because it would be oh-so-much better to PRIVATIZE it! Because OF COURSE everything the government does is wasteful, bloated, and completely leading America into hell!

As is his custom and his skill, DCap totally lays waste to their "arguments" (I use the term loosely), but as I was reading the post, I remembered something else I heard today on NPR about how Cantor and the other moron repugs in Congress are on a mission to reduce "job-destroying regulations" to help create jobs in America.

My train of thought then stopped at this station:
DOES ANYONE STILL BELIEVE THAT CORE REPUBLICAN TENETS ARE TRUE?

A few examples of typical republican thinking:
1. Privatization is the answer to cutting government waste, as business will do things better and cheaper.

2. Regulations on business mean loss of jobs. This goes for ANY kind of regulation, whether related to the environment, business practices, or whatever.

3. Abortion and any kind of family planning are wrong; any organizations that promote anything but abstinence should be de-funded.

4. The death penalty is the best way to deal with certain criminals.

5. Welfare, Social Security, Medicare, unemployment benefits -- all the government programs that are referred to as the "social safety net" are actually "entitlements," and entitlements are bad and should be cut and/or stopped.

These are just a few off the top of my head. Repugs have been parroting these things as Absolute Truth my entire adult life. From Ronald Reagan's Cadillac-driving welfare mothers to the proposed de-funding of Planned Parenthood, from claiming every life is precious so we shouldn't use birth control or abortion but criminals should die for their crimes, from the gutting of the social safety net to the rise of mercenaries like Blackwater and dirty-drinking-water-providers like Halliburton, the republicans have hit people over the head with this stuff for so long that many people actually believe it's true, proven fact.

But is it?

Let's look at these one at a time.

1. Does privatizing something actually cut costs or increase them? DCap's argument about the National Weather Service is proof positive that privatization would be MORE expensive than the current government-run program. If the NWS gets a billion bucks per year in funding, as the conservative think tank claims, that's ALL the weather information we see EVERYWHERE in the media coming to us for only $3.23 per every man, woman, and child in the US. Then, DCap argues, imagine how much it would cost if some corporate weather service were to charge us for this information; somehow, I don't think we'd be paying only three-and-a-quarter for our weather info, do you?
Let's look at the financial fiasco that was the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and the trillions that were/are being spent to hire such corporations as Blackwater, Halliburton, and more to provide everything from food and water to security. A congressional committee found that between $30 and $60 BILLION were lost to fraud, waste, and abuse.

Does ANYONE, besides republicans and their teabagger cousins, really think that American corporations -- the same ones that basically pay little or no taxes yet are granted personhood in the eyes of the law just like you or me -- can do ANYTHING without wasting, pissing away, or just plain stealing taxpayer money? I pay taxes to keep my government running, to keep it doing the things I expect government to do. I DON'T pay taxes so my government can give my money to profit-over-people, corner-cutting, mercenary assholes.

When will someone in power challenge this ridiculous assertion, this utter myth that privatization is good? Or will republicans simply continue to be allowed to spew this fallacy and slash regulations to continue helping their corporate benefactors increase their profits at the expense of the environment, ethics, and Americans?

2. Do regulations really "strangle" businesses so that they can't hire more people? I heard a story on NPR this afternoon that pretty much made it plain that this is bullshit:

Yet in a survey last month of 250 economists by the National Association for Business Economics, 4 out of 5 agreed that the current regulatory environment for American businesses was, in fact, good. In a July survey done by the Wall Street Journal in July, two-thirds of economists said the lack of jobs is due mainly to a lack of sales.

And the Wall Street Journal is not exactly a liberal rag, so they can't argue that I got this info from "the liberal media!" of NPR. And if you think about it, regulations that must be complied with can mean more jobs -- as long as more businesses keep those jobs in AMERICA instead of hiring shit-cheap labor from China, Bangladesh, and other places to up their profit margins while screwing American workers. Environmental protection, as the NPR piece mentions, demands equipment to filter emissions, wastewater, etc. -- someone has to make that equipment. Why not let Americans make the stuff?

Republicans also whine about how any other energy sources besides oil and coal are job-killers. This is patently absurd; think of how many American businesses could make a profit by installing geothermal heating systems, by making and installing solar panels, or by developing other alternative energy sources? American ingenuity could actually help us get off foreign oil, instead of dumping more and more money into tar sands and pipelines and fucking the environment in the process.

3. Let's deal with the abortion/family planning question with one logical assertion in which I have always believed: you cannot legislate morality. Questions about whether a fetus is a person, whether wearing a condom is killing a potential life, or whether Planned Parenthood is the devil can never truly be resolved; they are matters of opinion based on a person's individual beliefs. I myself belief a fetus is not a person; it's not a person until it's born. Still, I don't know whether I could go through with an abortion; it's not ever going to be an issue (unless AB is hiding something I don't know about in our bed!), so I don't have to know. I only know that it's MY body, and I would decide. No one, including the government or my parents or anyone else, can or should decide that for me or anyone.

Murder, on the other hand, is a crime because it's one living person ending the life of another living person. That one is NOT a question of morality; it's a tearing of the social fabric, ripping a person from all his worldly connections and thus harming not only him but the society in which he lives.

Which leads us to...
4. The death penalty is the best way to deal with criminals. Because I believe that no one has the right to kill another living person, it makes equal sense that the government should not have the right to kill anyone. The death penalty is a direct contradiction of republicans' belief that every life is precious, their usual supportive statement for their anti-family planning and anti-abortion stance. Because if every life is precious, then even the lives of murderers and drug dealers and whoever else they want to kill are precious, no? They can't have it both ways. I may not like murderers or drug dealers, and I may think I'd want to kill one with my bare hands if one ever hurt anyone I care about, but it's not up to me to kill anyone. And again -- I don't pay taxes so my government can effing kill people. (And by the way, that goes for wars too.)

5. Entitlements are bad! Just think about this: if our government didn't spend money on wars, what would our deficit look like? Conservative estimates of the costs of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars put the tab at over a trillion dollars; some estimates top three trillion dollars. Would we be arguing over a few billion in "entitlements" that keep children fed, the unemployed fed and housed, and our aging population fed and housed and cared for if our national debt weren't over $14.6 trillion dollars? And if these wars, which President Obama decided to stop hiding the costs of and thus gets blamed for the huge debt (instead of just hiding it like Bush/Cheney did), hadn't increased our debt a huge amount in a short period of time, would we even be letting these republicans spew their tripe about cutting the debt by hurting the poorest and neediest among us?

Further, think about this: what would happen if your parents or mine suddenly had their social security benefits and their Medicare benefits cut by half? Or even a third? Would they be able to pay their bills? Put food on their tables? They paid their whole lives into the system, and now repubs think these "entitlements" are just typical government waste. I suppose republicans never look at the fact that THEY are living ENTIRELY off the government -- except, of course, for those checks they get from the oil companies and other big business to do their bidding.

When will the media simply say, "ENOUGH!" and stop airing republican lies?

Today's daily FRIGHT

2011-08-11T18:31:00.000-07:00

Yesterday's daily fright occurred when I opened my mailbox and saw that damned Michele Bachman cover. Holy shit.

Today's daily fright: Rick Perry is runnin' fer prezdint.

Texas is in the worst shape it's ever been in, even worse than the Bush years (but only because of Bush's presidency and the financial collapse it caused to our economy). Yet this bozo thinks he can be -- and should be -- president of these United States.

He's already got the Texas spin machines working for him. Check out this slobber-soaked quote from an SMU (that's in Dallas) professor: "'I think Perry will shoot to the top of the polls right away, and be neck and neck with Romney,' said Cal Jillson, a political scientist at Southern Methodist University in Texas" (quoted in the Telegraph article). All his little minions are busy shaking the same money trees Bush used, I'm sure.

And those trees were loaded.

(P.S. -- I googled this Jillson fellow; read his over-the-top bio here. Despite the fact that the guy "is currently at work on a book titled Lone Star Tarnished on the shortcomings of Texas public policy," he makes a supremely stupid comment like this, knowing that perception is reality in the lame-stream media and this kind of blurbomatic crap just gets echoed around the Faux Nooz echo chamber of lies.)

We'll see whether Governor Goodhair (God I miss Molly Ivins) even gets out of the box. The sad part is that, if that article I just linked to is any indication, we're going to have to endure hairdo comparisons between Romney and Perry and the rest for the next year. That alone will raise his profile among the morons who thought his little prayer and fasting rally for rain in Texas was a good idea.

Ask the poor and the teachers and the prison inmates, etc., in Texas how great things are under Perry and see what they tell you.

I wonder...

2011-08-03T18:18:00.000-07:00

These thoughts occurred to me while listening to Fresh Air tonight, in which Terri Gross interviewed journalist Robert Draper about the influence of the recent influx of tea party-controlled reps in the House. I don't know much about Draper's personal leanings, but he certainly thinks these idiots hold a lot of power--which only feeds into the perception that they do. And because perception is more important than reality in Washington, I just got completely pissed off at Terri Gross for letting this guy talk about tea party morons and republicans for a whole fucking hour.

I wonder what it's like to be a tea partier in the House of Representatives, living in my office so I won't have an actual residence in D.C. After all, I sure wouldn't want to live in the real world, paying rent, buying groceries, cooking for myself and my family, and having deal with all that unimportant "real life" crap. I sure wouldn't want my constituents to think I sold out by having an apartment in the Sodom-and-Gomorrah that is Washington D.C.!

Think of it: sleeping on a cot or a couch in my office (all of which is paid for by our tax dollars), working out and showering and such in the taxpayer-funded gym at the (corporate-funded?) Capitol, and devoting every waking hour to politicking and voting and being whipped around by the Majority Whip!

One of the coolest parts of being in the House would, of course, be the fact that I wouldn't really have to do anything but these things. I wouldn't have to worry about healthcare (it's provided for free!), or retirement (yeah, that's provided too!), or shopping for groceries (I'd eat in the Capitol cafeteria!) or anything -- all I'd have to do is make sure I voted like Eric Cantor wants me to, worshiped Boner's nuclear-induced tan, and walked the razor-thin line between voting against any and all tax hikes for the rich and pretending I give a shit about what taxes are paid by middle-class Americans -- because "no more taxes!" means "no more taxes," man!

And hey--I can always pose for photo ops in my skivvies and claim I work 20 hours a day, pay for my own stationery, and try to opt out of my guaranteed-no-opting-out-of-it healthcare plan! See, America! I'll never sell out!

And when the whip-guy plays us a video about how bad-ass we're gonna be and how people are gonna get hurt! to get us all pumped up and prepped to vote NO on anything the President or those damned democrats propose, I'll truly believe I'm a bad ass. And if any of you non-patriots think I've completely lost touch with reality, then you obviously aren't a christian or a patriot.

So I'll watch a movie, snap my fellow tea partiers on the ass with my towel in the gym, REFUSE to raise taxes on the rich or even close the millions of loopholes that allow billionaires and corporations to pay practically nothing in taxes. Why take that money when we can just cut spending on the poor, the aged, and the young instead? Easy peasy! "We're gonna hurt some people!"

In the past I've wondered how and "liberal" became a dirty word. Now, the big dirty word is "entitlements." All the republicans and tea partiers talk about is "entitlements" and how we have to cut them, by golly, or else!

Of course, they're not talking about the REAL entitlements -- like the unlimited funding for anything that can be remotely considered "defense spending." Whether it's trying to make sharks into spies or teach soldiers to communicate telepathically, or pouring trillions into boondoggles like the Iraq and Afghanistan wars, these guaranteed trillions are somehow NOT ENTITLEMENTS! I guess those people deserve those trillions, right? No, the bad entitlements we absolutely have to cut is stuff like medicare, social security, and healthcare -- because the people getting this money are REALLY bleeding us dry! THAT'S the true problem!

Yup, being a tea partier -- representing a fraction of the population that's too stupid to realize they're voting against their own self interests (wait until THEY retire or need healthcare) -- would pretty much rock. I'd eat, sleep, and breathe politics, because that's what I was elected to do, right? It's all about winning these political battles, not living in the real world.

But OF COURSE I would stay strong in the knowledge that I'm representing the little guy while I'm making sure the rich pay no more taxes! Making sure I cut the government spending that actually HELPS most Americans! Completely ignoring the true sources of government waste (defense spending, wars, lifetime healthcare and benefits for all members of Congress)!

P.S. -- Wanna get a headache? Check this out.

Interesting or disgusting: you decide

2011-06-08T19:42:00.000-07:00

1. This whole Anthony Weiner weiner-pic business is pretty funny and all -- I mean, who sends sexting pics of himself in his tighty whities??? Maybe he's trolling for Jennifer Aniston?-- but what I don't understand is why the dem leadership are all calling for him to resign for his silly little panty-pics, yet repug David Vitter can buy hookers and wear diapers and somehow he still keeps his job.

The dem leadership is talking about how important it is that a congressman's constituency still respects him -- but who the hell respects Diaper-boy Vitter? But who's still kept his job through it all?

Senator Huggies 'n' Hos

More of the "it's okay if you're a republican" double standard, I guess.

2. My candidate for the most misogynist commercial of all time: the Klondike "guy listens to his wife for five whole seconds!" ad. Have you seen this? It's been all over cable TV lately, especially for some reason during all the programs I watch (Red Sox baseball, USA's series like "In Plain Sight" etc.). I'm glad to see someone at Feministing noticed it too. It's been driving me effing crazy lately. And of course the wife just talks about boring shit like visiting friends or whatever, and OH MY GOD it's so hard for the guy to listen to his WIFE. The woman he married.

How fucking stupid is he if he married someone he couldn't stand to listen to for five seconds?

Put on your Mittens!

2011-06-02T18:48:00.000-07:00

Yay for me.

It's official: Mittens Romney is STILL running for president, dammit, and PLEASE -- won't someone care? Anybody????

As NPR's Robert Smith insightfully pointed out today, Mittens never stopped running for president after losing out on the republican slot to McCan't and the moron. Mittsy's been all over New England for the last two years, eschewing his suits and ties and pretending to be a real person who gives a shit about people. Smith's report was fairly hilarious and worth listening to -- especially when he talks about how hard Mittens is trying to look like a regular guy instead of a "hedge-fund Ken Doll." Nice one.

My initial reaction to hearing Mittsy's announcement (after I laughed) is that it's kind-of pathetic when your newly crowned frontrunner is basically one of the guys who lost early last time. Tell you what: Let's examine the records of such candidates, shall we? Guys (or women?) who didn't get the nomination in one campaign but who come back and get it in a later election and go on to win the presidency. Right off the top of my head, I know where to start.

It's 1976. Gerald Ford is the republican candidate almost by default, having taken over from resignee Nixon and defeated such lame-ass challengers as Ronald Reagan for the republican nomination. Ford, however, loses the election to an upstart, Jimmy Carter.

I remember this campaign as a kid (I was in 6th grade). A friend's parents were going on and on at the dinner table about how great this Ronald Reagan was. I'd never heard of him, despite my mom's steady diet for us of old movies; I don't think my parents ever liked Reagan as an actor. They liked him less as a politician.

So 1980 rolls around and we get to the high point of the story: Reagan comes back after losing out to Ford in '76 and this time he not only gets the repub nomination; he wins the election over incumbent Carter. I'm sure Mittens is looking back to this event and feeling inspired. From governor to losing candidate to president! Mittsy could be just like Saint Reagan!

Dare little Mittens hope for such a repeat of history? I looked through the other elections since then and found no one who was able to overcome losing the party's nomination and then coming back and winning the whole thing.

1984 had an interesting slate of losing dems, among them Al Gore, Howard Dean, and Joe Biden on the dem side and Bob Dole on the repub side. All tried again to become president on their own later and didn't make it. Gore came the closest, exactly 20 years after Reagan's win, but we all know what happened then.

In 2004, after losing the repub nomination to The Idiot King in 2000, McGrumps managed to get the nomination over Mike Fuckabee, our little Mittens, nobody Tim Pawlenty, and Fred "The Sloth" Thompson. Might it happen again? Might Johnny War be the next Raygun?Um, no. Once again, an upstart wins: Obama takes the presidency and McGramps is left to wonder how he could've lost after selling out his dignity, his morals, his mother, and pretty much anything else he could get a hold of.

So we're back to 2012's campaign, and all we're hearing about is the slew of repub candidates:
There's Casual Mittsy, T-Paw again (no, not T'Pau), that crazy-ass psycho Michelle Bachmann, maybe Failin' (should she grace us with her presence), PRick Santorum (guffaw), Nudie Gingrich, and maybe Fuckabee again.

What an impressible stable of candidates! Time will tell whether Mittens can pull off a Reagan and win this thing.

Right now, I'm thinking, "Um, no."

Question for the day

2011-06-01T19:34:00.000-07:00

How did Mike Rowe go from QVC generic guy to "Dirty Jobs" star to being a spokesperson for trucks, jeans, and paper towels to narrating every damned series on Discovery Channel, The Science Channel, and more? I mean, how do you do a gig where you talk about your girlfriend saying your "butt looks good" in these jeans on one channel, and then on another channel you're narrating a show with real scientists and telling us about supernovae and pulsars?

How is this possible? Who is this guy's agent? What the hell is so great about him? I mean, look at this schlub:Does he really know anything about black holes?

He's probably a freakin' gazillionaire.

HOW????

If this is your "revolution," then I want no part of it.

2011-04-05T19:08:00.000-07:00

I heard two pieces on NPR today that made me so livid that I had to fight hard not to vomit on my steering wheel.

First came a story about the California town of Costa Mesa, which has just informed its public employees that half of them would be laid off within the next six months. The workers have been devastated; one of them, "reportedly distraught about the layoffs, jumped to his death from the roof of City Hall." Does this sound familiar?

So what's the solution to their budget crisis? Privatize everything, of course! Fire everyone, naturally! And what's the republican/tea party response to these events?

Why, it's an opportunity! Orange County republican party head Scott Baugh is then heard telling a tea party gathering, "Ground zero is right here in Costa Mesa for this revolution!"

Let's look at that again. The situation in Costa Mesa, where fully half of public employees will LOSE THEIR JOBS -- where the government will be paying people less and no longer providing people the opportunity to look forward to a decent retirement -- This is what republicans/tea party morons are calling a "revolution?"

Balancing the budget on the backs of your workers? Cutting pensions and going back on your commitments to people who came to work every day and held up their end of the bargain? Privatizing everything (which ALWAYS cuts costs! Just see the military budget for proof!) and saying "it's not too hard to figure out" that you're going to save money, though no one can say just how much (if any!) will be saved?

If this is your "revolution," then I want no part of it.

- - -

Later came an interview with Rep. Joe Walsh (what else? R - Illinois), a member of the "House Tea Party Caucus" -- what the fuck is that? It's NOT an official party, but they have a caucus in the House? -- anyway, I heard this guy claim that democrats are doing all they can to shut down the government because they won't "compromise" on spending cuts. Walsh claimed that republicans have been the ones putting forth bills while dems have "been silent" and "the President should be ashamed."

The latest (ahem) brainchild they've put out there cuts $61 billion from social programs and education (among other things like Planned Parenthood) while funding the military for the rest of the year.

Surprisingly, NPR's Melissa Block challenged Mr. Compromise several times, repeating his soundbyte, "I came here ready to go to war -- the people didn't send me here to compromise," and basically asking when he's ever shown a willingness to compromise. He then claimed, "again, it's 'cooperate' not 'compromise.'" Oh I get it -- so your idea of "compromise" and "cooperate" is to have the dems come to the table, bend over, and let you ram your shit up their asses. Otherwise, THEY'RE the ones not "compromising." THEY'RE the ones being irresponsible and "mystifying" to him.

"I'd love to see a number though that they would put in front of us," he claims. "Can I accept less than 61B in cuts? I sure hope not...." I think this guy needs to look up "compromise" and "cooperate" in the dictionary.

Separate disgust stems from the fact that I can't remember the last time I heard a freshman democratic rep on NPR being allowed to deliver an uninterrupted tirade about anything.

Still more disgust springs from the idea that republicans claim to be serious about cutting the deficit, yet NOWHERE do they touch military spending -- despite the fact that the published figures (which doesn't include the tons of spending bills and other secret money that the Pentagon gets) show that it accounts for 25% of our budget. Here's a nice link to the true cost of our many ongoing wars.

But hey, let's cut education and pensions and Social Security; let's raze Medicare and Medicaid to the ground and leave the aged and our children to fend for themselves at the feet of the zillionaires at the insurance companies. Let's lay off workers and call it a "revolution!" and pretty much not even put a fucking dent in the REAL deficit, not even TRY to do anything to reduce our spending on wars in the Middle East.

No, let's just clog the news cycle with bullshit about "they want to shut down the government!" and "they won't compromise!" and every other horseshit bill that our government throws out there, and then we can just brush over the fact that a guy jumped off a building because he was upset about losing his job.

In Tunisia a fruit vendor, upset over the loss of his job, set himself on fire -- and triggered a revolution.

What will it take to get true revolution here?

What if _________ were gay?

2011-03-30T21:04:00.001-07:00

It occurred to me recently that our history, our present, our future could be incredibly and unrecognizably different if certain prominent figures were gay. Dare I say it might be a better place? I don't want to offend you hets, but let's think about this for a moment.

WHAT IF RONALD REAGAN WERE GAY?

REAGAN ANNOUNCES BILLIONS IN RESEARCH FUNDING FOR NEW MYSTERY ILLNESS -- headline in the New York Times

Look at that suit. All he
needs is a little paisley scarf.

It's 1982 and President Reagan, out of concern for millions of gay men who are dying of mysterious affliction some doctors are calling Gay-Related Immunodeficiency Syndrome, has announced that he will increase funding to NIH and the CDC to try to learn more about the spectrum of illnesses and how to stop them. "I care about my fellow homosexuals," Reagan said in an exclusive interview with Barbara Walters. "I've known all my life that I was gay, and my partner Hank and I are dealing with a lot of loss right now -- our friends are dying, people's sons and fathers and brothers are dying. As president, I can help stop these needless deaths. Forget missile shields in space and other such boondogglery; I want to save lives."

Oh, if only. Let's keep dreaming, shall we? (Is "boondogglery" a word?)

WHAT IF ABRAHAM LINCOLN WERE GAY?

Look at that impish grin. He's
probably thinking about Joshua
Fry Speed right now.

Oh wait. This one's kind-of a gimme. The guy didn't get all war-crazed and say "fuck the rebels! blow 'em to hell!" like, say, a moron hetero like Chimpy would've. Nope, he was sensible. Sensitive. Thoughtful. Gay, perhaps? He brought our nation through a bitter and bloody civil war; he helped bring an end to slavery. Let's face it -- probably gay! It's not like we haven't all heard the stories!

Let's keep thinking. Maybe a movie star...

WHAT IF TOM CRUISE WERE GAY?Oh wait. Yeah. Gay. Obvy! Okay. Let's think here. No more Hollywood. Let's go back east to the tough guys....

WHAT IF J. EDGAR HOOVER WERE GAY?

"Ooooh, watch where you point that thing, tough guy!"

Well, shit! This is really hard! Who else?

Editorial Note: I really DO wish Reagan had been gay, and not just gay but OPENLY gay. Of course, he'd never have been president -- unless we started our little game so far back in history that, by the time 1980 rolled around, homosexuality was completely accepted. So let's try that....

WHAT IF ALEXANDER THE GREAT...oh fuck.

WHAT IF JULIUS CAESAR WERE GAY?

"Talk to me, Marky Mark."

Hmmm. I know the Greeks were always having man-sex, but what about the Romans? If my barely passable knowledge of the Roman Empire is correct, I don't recall any gay rumors among the Caesars or Marc Antonys of Rome. Still, there was that whole stabbing on the Ides of March thing. Jilted lovers? Gay drama? Bizarre love triangle? You decide.

Moving on through history...

WHAT IF KING ARTHUR WERE GAY?

Where IS that handsome Lancelot?

So after pulling the sword from the stone and becoming the boy king, Arthur Pendragon gets Merlin to set him up this hot guy named Lancelot. They hang out together, sword-fighting (ahem) and creating Camelot, decorating the castle just so. Guinevere is never able to turn Lance's head so none of that drama starts. Instead all people are allowed to love whomever they want, and they all drink from the grail at weddings both gay and straight.

Onward....

WHAT IF QUEEN ELIZABETH WERE GAY?

Imagine her in some khakis,
a button-down shirt,
and some Hush Puppies.
Can you say "World Peace"?

Now THIS isn't hard. She'd still have remained single, still have kicked ass in battle, still have been the ruler of the free world -- and she would've gotten to wear sensible shoes and comfy clothes instead of that weirdo kabuki makeup and stuff. The Gay Virgin Queen! Bring on women's lib, Renaissance style! Pants for everyone! Some Italian invents Doc Martins and we all live happily ever after in a Shakespearean sonnet!

WHAT IF RICHARD NIXON WERE GAY?

"Hey, Macarena--YEAH!"

All republicans would be officially gay, by order of the President. End of story.

WHAT IF GLENN BECK WERE GAY?

"All I want is a REAL relationship with a hot and
loving man! Is that so much to ask, people?"

Then he wouldn't be such a fucking douche bag, now would he? He'd demand equal rights for all, collective bargaining rights for all unions, and a permanent social safety net -- all at the expense of bullshit military spending. Oh, we'd still have a military....But WHAT A MILITARY!

Editor's Note: I didn't link to any American soldier dancing videos because, well, how can I put this without insulting our brave men and women in combat? Let's just say that we really need some gays in the military, if only to teach these guys how to dance.

Today's top scary stories!

2011-03-24T19:02:00.001-07:00

In no particular order:

--Infants shouldn't drink tap water in Japan due to radiation levels.

--You'd better hope you're not deemed a "terror suspect," what with the government's latest assault on personal rights.

--Miss Shell-Shocked Bachman announces she's interested in being president. Because Sarah Palin wasn't fucking scary enough.

What's scaring you today?

Our latest adventure in empire

2011-03-19T18:01:00.000-07:00

Tough to know how to feel about this latest (ahem) entanglement we're getting ourselves into. I feel for the Libyan rebels who, fresh from watching the Egyptians take out Mubarak with little or no blood, set themselves the task of taking back their country from Muammar Gadhafi (spell it however; it doesn't matter). They had a few days of success, followed by a flexing of the military muscle Qaddafi (whatever) got from (who else?) us, the Russians, whoever.

The rebels started out saying they didn't need anyone's help; now they're begging for help.

So we've gotten a UN resolution (1974, bring back Jerry Ford!) to go in and clear the decks for a no-fly zone. Only a few weeks ago, Hillary and others were screeching about how there was no WAY we'd do that because it would involve bombing!; now it's bombs away, everyone! France bomb! Britain bomb! Everybody bomb!

But remember that our role is limited! Obama's assertions that he won't involve any ground troops remind me of Georgie Sr's "read my lips: no new taxes!" pledge, especially when I read what the military guys are saying:

Vice Admiral Bill Gortney, director of the U.S. military's Joint Staff, said of the U.S. role: "We are on the leading edge of a coalition military operation. This is just the first phase of what will likely be a multiphase operation."

"first phase"? "multiphase"? Well, shit.

And what of budget cuts and government shut-downs and deficit hawks? Hey, folks, this is MILITARY spending we're talking about here. That's off limits. Now you old people and sick people and poor people -- get ready to bend over and take it up the qaddafi because we've got to cut this deficit!

When did up become down?

2011-03-02T21:05:00.001-08:00

When exactly did the change happen -- the change during which democrats became republicans and republicans became assholes?

Let's look at a few noteworthy elements. During the Civil War and Reconstruction, republicans -- the party of Lincoln -- were fighting for the rights of freed black slaves to own property, vote, work for money, and other rights that only whites had previously. Republicans were pro-Union (USA, that is) and fought to keep everyone working as one nation. Democrats (Dixiecrats) were shouting "states' rights!" and Jim Crow-lawing the fuck out of freed slaves and black people right into the Civil Rights era, trying to keep alive the old ways of slavery, persecution, and lynching of blacks. Granted, republicans were always pro-business, but labor unions leveled the playing field and made sure that everyone made a fair wage for their work.

Today, it's the democrats who embrace the minorities, who fight for the little guy, who help the businesses but still support the unions. Republicans are now completely in the corporations' pockets, and corporatocracy favors the white man and all the money he can steal from pretty much everyone, black or white. Far-right republicans, or "tea party" supporters, are now the ones who shout "states' rights!" whenever a democratic president wants to do something they don't like. Gay marriage? States' rights to stop that perversion, no matter what Washington says! Legal abortion? States' rights to prosecute those baby-killing doctors and put 'em to death, no matter what the federal laws are! Labor unions? States' rights and "right to work" (i.e., right to be unemployed at the company's will) forever!

When did the switcheroo happen? Why did it happen? When did the republicans become the party of whiteys and the dems become the party of the rest of us? When did republicans say "fuck the Union!" and start hollering "states' rights!" everytime something didn't go their ideological way? I know that George "segregation foe-evah!" Wallace was a republican; my parents hated that guy! But when did that switch happen?

Did republicans, the party of anti-slavery, tap into the racism of the south in order to win the south's vote? Was that it? Or maybe they were always racist, and perhaps I'm unduly equating anti-slavery with anti-racism. Perhaps I'm generalizing that all northerners, and thus all northern republicans, were all pro-integration, pro-civil rights. Maybe it was just the poor ones, the ones NOT in power, who favored treating the black man fairly.

I'm no history scholar; I know only a little, albeit about a lot of things. But this has been rolling around in my brain for a while, as we watch the union battles in Wisconsin between the corporatocracy's republicans versus the common people's democrats. Why do republicans hate unions? Is it pure greed, pure pro-business at the expense of everything else? Hell, democrats are taking a lot of the same corporate money as republicans, but they're still largely supporting labor unions.

So what gives?

Taking bets...

2011-02-28T19:54:00.000-08:00

potential story for Matty Boy's tabloid blog,
headlined "Gadaffi and Jacko join forces for Victory tour!"

How much longer before Gadaffi (how many different ways can you spell it?) either offs himself in a big martyr-style fashion or is just pushed out and runs away to some undisclosed location?

I give him another week, tops. Then he's going to either go nuts and kill himself (and probably his whole family -- the guy's nuts), or he's going to just sneak out of the country and turn up someplace else.

An interesting opinion

2011-02-24T18:19:00.000-08:00

I heard one of the guys on Stephanie Miller's show the other day saying that no one seems to have noticed the possible connection between President Obama's strategy on the Middle East (the whole "we are not your enemy" approach) and the emergence of rebellions and protests in Egypt, Libya, and Tunisia. He thought that maybe Chimpy's "bomb them into democracies" policy didn't exactly create a climate conducive to revolution, while maybe Obama's relative hands-off policy might.

Of course, this assumes that Obama HAS a hands-off policy. He has continued the war in Afghanistan and we're not exactly out of Iraq yet either. Still, I do wonder if maybe the protesters at least feel that Obama won't rush to bomb the fuck out of them to defend old dictators in the name of "stability" or whatever.

He also mentioned the excellent point that, were Obama to offer any kind of tangible more-than-just-kind-words assistance to the protesters, the loyalists would seize on that support as evidence that the entire protest is simply an American-backed destabilization effort.

I'm not exactly up on Obama's foreign policy, as I kinda feel like he doesn't really seem to have one (other than continue wars, don't piss anyone off, don't make any bold moves), so I ask those of you who know more than I do: what role do you think Obama's different approach to the Middle East has played in the current climate of rebellion there?

Random thoughts on protest and Egypt

2011-02-18T17:44:00.000-08:00

I'm really liking that protest fever is spreading, from Tunisia to Egypt to Wisconsin! I have been asking myself often lately whether a mass protest in DC could ever topple our government, or even make a whit of difference. Of course, we've HAD mass protests in DC and they've never made a difference; think of all those gay rights marches and peace protests.

But really, could US leadership ever be destabilized by anything its citizens might do in terms of protest? I don't think so, mainly because of the set-up of this country. It's too big, too diffuse -- I could maybe imagine that a big protest in Rhode Island, say against their governor, might have some effect. And I'm only using RI as an example because it's tiny, but picture this: let's say that the governor of RI gets into some big sex scandal or something. He gets caught stealing money right out of the state treasury or whatever. So tons of people (well, at least as many people as they have in Rhode Island) march down to (what the hell is their capital?) Providence (?) and start protesting, yelling "throw da bum out!" or whatever. I can see this having an effect; the governor, knowing he's been caught, might resign. It's a small state, and the crime was clear, and things could fall apart.

But let's say people in the US got fed up--for some of the same reasons the people in Egypt got fed up, like no jobs, a government that wasn't listening, corruption, etc. And god knows the corruption and not-listening in our government are pretty extreme. Still -- could any protest be mustered that would cause our president (or even a congressman or anyone in power) to step down? Would enough Americans unite? Where would they protest, to have maximum effect? If there were, say, protests in every state capitol, would that do it?

Doubtful.

I think our government is pretty much downright insulated from anything that we normal humans outside the Beltway do, whether it's protest or suffering or joblessness or every other ill we deal with every day. Our American Revolution already happened, and it will never happen again, no matter how rotten-to-the-core and completely corrupt and corporate our government gets.

On a related note, did you notice that the Patriot Act's clutches are still around our throats and will likely remain there? It barely got mentioned in the media today, even on Democracy NOW!'s show tonight. Yup, "roving wiretaps" and other violations of freedom will likely be extended by Mr. Constitution Scholar.

Back to Wisconsin: has there ever been a more bold-faced attempt at union-busting than Walker's little ploy? At least that's getting the press it deserves, and even President Obama said it sounded like union-busting to him.

For the love of cheese!

2011-02-06T19:29:00.000-08:00

Well, as a Cowboys fan, I'm not exactly a Green Bay Packer lover, but I'm sure glad they beat the Steelers! Especially glad that Roger Staubach didn't have to hand the Steelers the trophy, although he did have to stand next to Terry Bradshaw on the dais. Did you notice how fast he got outta there?

A question

2011-02-01T17:38:00.001-08:00

So... listening to the latest incremental back-down from power by Hosni Mubarek (I'm sure even he sees the writing on the wall), a question comes to mind.

IF -- IF we actually stay out of the Egyptian uprising and they have a free and fair election, with their own candidates who took it upon themselves to run for office....

...will this be the first time we have NOT stepped in during a power-vacuum situation to put in our own little puppet dictator? (See, oh I don't know, maybe Hussein, Saddam; Karzai, Hamed; Noriega, Manuel; Pinochet, Augusto....)

Will President Obama be able to resist the temptation? Will he continue to just stand aside and use words, not military/black-ops interference to (ahem) "influence" the outcome of any Egyptian elections? Will the Egyptians get the revolution they want?

On Obama's latest capitulation

2010-12-08T12:00:00.000-08:00

Far be it from me to state that President Obama's done nothing while in office. He's (probably) created some jobs with the economic stimulus package, he's passed some albeit tepid healthcare policy, he's overseeing some improvement in the economy, and--who knows?--he might just get "Don't Ask/Don't Tell" off the books.

Still, it seems like it's always one step forward and two steps back, especially given the complete stonewalling of republicans whenever anything just might possibly get done in this country and the media's worship of said stonewalling. Assholes like McChinless and the Bronze Boner don't actually have to DO anything, help anyone, show even an ounce of caring for us little people. They just have to say NO and the Faux Nooz morons drool over their "principles" and admire them for things like cutting off jobless benefits and giving us poor slobs a tax break.

It's easy for Pelosi and her chums to claim Obama's a turncoat; they still have their jobs with no sign of losing them, especially Pelosi. Obama's essentially caught between a rock and an asshole, the Scylla and Charybdis of choosing us little people over himself and his reputation. He's catching hell for choosing to help us little people, of course. But what the hell else was there to be done? You can bet that if he'd "stood firm" or "stuck to his principles" or whatever other cliche the media's using today, come April 15 we all would've been crying about how he didn't help us out. Even sooner, when unemployment benefits ran out and people were basically hitting the streets, progressives would've been tearing their hairshirts and claiming Obama done 'em so wrong.

Obama manages to save the tax cuts and jobless benefits for the rest of us, and the media basically portrays him as bending over with Boner's boner in his ass.

(Sorry for that image; maybe I've been reading too much of The Rude Pundit.)

It's a serious case of "you can't win for losing." Obama defends his move, stating that he had to give in or millions of Americans would pay thousands more in taxes next year and/or would be cut-off from their unemployment checks (more on that in a second). The media paints it like this:

Forced to choose between standing with the Democratic leadership and his own liberal base, or compromising with the ascendant Republicans in Congress, the U.S. President opted to turn his back on his own party.

Can't a brother get a break?

Nope.

Hey, so long as the rich get to keep their billions, who's going to say they're wrong? Millions of stupid Americans voted MORE of these republican assholes into office last month, so the McChinlesses and Boners of the world pretty much know they're golden, untouchable. They do NOTHING to help our country, yet the media slobbers all over them, calls Obama a pussy, and the rich get richer. Landslide win for the republicans. Fuck the rest of us.

P.S.: I wrote this Dec 7, but I wanted to give Elizabeth Edwards her day at the top of my blog.

Rest in peace, Elizabeth Edwards

2010-12-07T18:14:00.000-08:00

Another woman succumbs to breast cancer.

What the hell is this about?

2010-11-19T14:33:00.000-08:00

I have from time to time found myself asking, "What the hell?" when I listen to the news as so many of the repugs' moves make no sense whatsoever. Here's a recent list:

1. What the hell is the repugs' blocking of re-signing the START treaty about? Why would they not want to sign a treaty that was first proposed and signed by their own GHW Bush, especially when it limits the number of nukes other countries like Russia can build to aim at us? (Not that they're even bothering with trying to blow us up anymore--why bother?)

2. What the hell is the Israelis' refusal to stop building on other people's land about? Let's say for the sake of saying that Iranians sneaked across Jordan and starting building "settlements" in Israel. The Israelis would nuke Iran so fucking fast we wouldn't even have time to say "What the hell?" Yet the Israelis feel they can build their "settlements" wherever the fuck they want to, no matter whether the land's ownership is truly decided or not. And for this, the whole "peace in the Middle East" thing fails yet again. If only some Palestinians could secretly rent some of these apartment and homes right out from under the Israelis. But I suppose that's probably impossible.

3. What the hell is this new "Inside the State Department" show about? Have you seen it yet? Exclusive interviews with and following around of Hillary Clinton waxing philosophical about her role as Sec of State, blah blah blah. Why would she be doing this show now? Is this some kind of PR exposure for a possible run for VP or even President? Not that I wouldn't vote for her, but -- this seems weird.

Be careful what you wish for

2010-11-04T18:22:00.000-07:00

It's tempting to sign up for these "updates," isn't it?

So the repugs got what they wished for--the House--though they didn't get the Senate. Their super-way-out freaks (Angle, O'Donnell, Buck) did not win, thankfully. But Rand Paul and a lot of others did. Pennsylvania, a state that had gone blue in the last three presidential elections, now has shiny new repug governor, lt. governor, and senator.

And now we can see what the repugs do with their new-found (newly bought?) power. The Bronze Boner will take Nancy Pelosi's chair, and may the full-court press of "HELL, NO!" continue!

I'm curious to see whether they'll actually get anything done, whether it's their ridiculously vague Compact with America or Treaty with America or whatever they called it or something more radical. It's pretty easy to just say NO all the time, instead of coming up with ideas of their own, but then that's never slowed them down before.

Note: Many people are predicting the repugs will start working toward impeachment as soon as they can--anything they can do to tarnish and weaken the president even further. It's not like they need to use facts, after all -- amplified lies have been their stock in trade since Faux Nooz's first broadcast day.

It looks like they'll be crawling up the administration's ass to ensure nothing happens during the next two years, so don't expect anything productive to come out the government anytime soon.

WE DID IT!

2010-10-22T20:20:00.000-07:00

WE BEAT THE YANKEES!

Republicans successfully block the universe

2010-09-28T17:57:00.000-07:00

It seems a day doesn't go by that I don't hear about some democratic bill being blocked by the "minority party" republicans. It's incredible what a party with absolutely no ideas, no morals, and no scruples can do to the supposed majority in Congress.

The latest blockade prevented a bill to end tax breaks for U.S. companies who send jobs overseas. Bitch McConnell claimed that the bill was merely a last-ditch effort by dems only "pretending" to care about American workers, calling the bill "an insult to the millions of Americans who want us to focus on jobs."

So let me get this straight: we're losing jobs overseas, we've been losing them overseas for a while now. Companies get all kinds of tax breaks and deferrals when they send our jobs overseas. So a bill that would try to make companies either keep jobs here or have to pay more taxes is... a bad thing?

Uh-huh. Okay. Um, so he's saying that a bill that would punish companies for taking jobs overseas is an insult to American workers. And hey, those dems who proposed this punishment are just "pretending," so let's NOT make those companies pay extra taxes for taking jobs overseas! That'll show those dems for pretending to care!

Instead we'll let the repugs "focus on jobs" by--wait for it!--making the Bush-era tax cuts, even those for the richest Americans, permanent! Because those tax cuts certainly have created lots and lots of American jobs, and that's why the economy is humming along swimmingly, dear! Status quo all the way, baby!

Besides, no one could ever accuse repuglicans of pretending to care about American workers.

The best part, I think, is his justification of his party's policy of obstructionism:

"The Senate is operating how it should," he said, explaining that President Obama's "far-left agenda" forced the Republican conference to try to block what McConnell described as terrible policy.
"There are differences of opinion in a big country," McConnell added, speaking to reporters at a breakfast hosted by the Christian Science Monitor.

This guy's a fucking comic genius. No wonder he's the speaker for the minority party. He had me positively roaring with laughter right from his opening line, "The Senate is operating," because, really, since when has the Senate done a goddamned thing, much less operate "how it should?" Whew! I'm slapping my knee right now, practically crying from laughing so hard.

But the real crowd-pleaser comes when he calls President Obama's a "far-left agenda." Boy, who knew that pretty much rubber-stamping the Bush era policies of government secrecy, keeping DADT, staying in Iraq and Afghanistan, and letting Wall Street go pretty much completely unpunished (if not rewarded) for bringing down the entire world's economy was "far-left?" Oh Bitch, you're cracking me up! I'm practically blowing milk out my nostrils! Tell me another one!

That Bitch McConnell. He really knows how to bring the house, not to mention the Senate, down.

An informal poll

2010-09-16T18:44:00.000-07:00

Do you think President Obama will win a second term?

Apparently, we no longer have a two-party system

2010-09-14T19:17:00.000-07:00

Has anyone else noticed how, in the span of less than two years, this collection of ultra-right-wing morons calling themselves the "Tea Party" has actually become a party, at least in the MSM? These idiots are getting more and more attention as a legitimate third party, completely separate from the republicans (because, according to a report on NPR today, republicans aren't conservative enough).

Did Nader get this much attention in 2000 (at least before the election)? Hardly. Does any other party not calling itself Democratic or Republican get this much attention? Again, hardly.

The Green Party, the Progressives, the Libertarian Party--those are always treated as just fringe movements, never legit third party options; they're just random people stealing votes away from Dems or Repugs. But just today, I heard yet another report on NPR's "All Things Considered" about how all these "Tea Party candidates" are winning elections. Just look at NPR's Election 2010 page; there are three stories about Tea Party bullshit in Delaware, and only one about Democrats. (Republicans don't even rate the front page, not that I mind.)

So after all years and all this talk about how we'll never get true reform until we get more than a two-party system, etc. etc. etc. -- THIS is the party the media chooses to pay attention to and hence give some semblance of legitimacy to?

I have to ask, WHY? Why THIS 'party' that isn't even a party so much as a collection of Glenn Beck/Sarah Palin-worshipping idiots with overtly racist and classist talking points?

I'm sure it couldn't be the gazillions of dollars thrown into these races by people who made their gazillions by voting republican but who are now turning their backs on the republican party because King Georgie apparently didn't do enough to push us toward a dictatorship.

A question

2010-09-07T18:46:00.000-07:00

Why are Americans so stupid?

Hey, Gibbs!

2010-08-12T19:39:00.000-07:00

If you think the "professional left" is such a pain in your ass, try winning an election without them.

(I'd love to say "without us," but being a leftie hasn't paid off since I voted twice, once at home and once at college, for Ann Richards in the same election.)

Saint Ann, a proud progressive

I got a little bone to pick

2010-08-06T21:05:00.001-07:00

the senator in question

It's been a few days since I heard this idiotic statement during an NPR story on Missouri's vote against the Obama healthcare bill, but it's been bugging the hell out of me. Here's the statement, made by Missouri state senator Jane Cunningham, who is of course a republican:

It is unprecedented in the United States of America for a government to say just because you live in this land and you breathe in this land, you will buy a product, any product, with your own money against your will. That has never before happened in America.

Now I don't want to talk about stupid Missouri thinking they can make a state law that will trump federal law (BTW, hello, Arizona, the "stupid" tag applies to you too). That's not the bone I want to pick.

No, what I have a problem with is the stupidity of republican talking points, this one being just the latest in the ever-escalating moronic talking points of the republican/tea party.

Let's take a look at this statement which Sen. Cunningham blasts at the oh-so-unfair idea of getting everyone health insurance so that we're not going broke paying for people to go to the ER all the fucking time because they have no insurance. (oops, sorry, I picked at another bone there. Sorry.)

So "never before" has it "happened in America" that we, who "live in this land and... breathe in this land," have been forced by "a government" to "buy a product, any product, with [our] own money against our will" -- is that your contention, senator? Is that your problem with the health care law? It's "unprecedented?"

Because I have to call bullshit on that, madam. Why, you ask? Let me offer you a short list of "products" we as living breathing Americans have been forced by this government to pay for with our own money and against our will:
1. Iraq War
2. Afghan War
3. War on drugs
4. the first Gulf War
Shall I go on? Because believe me, I could think of PLENTY of "products" this government has used our money to pay for even though many of us were pretty fucking against them. We paid our money in taxes so that King Georgie McChimp could pretty much just give it to his rich friends, his dad, Halliburton, and BlackWater. And yet I don't remember you speaking up for those of us who didn't want that "product" and didn't want our money spent on that product.

But now, when our president tries to actually do something for people BESIDES those rich friends and family -- whether it's gonna work or not, the effort and intention were there, Senator -- NOW you want to argue that "It is unprecedented in the United States of America for a government to say just because you live in this land and you breathe in this land, you will buy a product, any product, with your own money against your will. That has never before happened in America"?

NOW you're saying this? Like the government has NEVER BEFORE shoved some bullshit policy or imperialist war or tax cut for the super-rich down our throats and demanded we pay for it?

Bullshit, Senator Cunningham. Bullshit. Oh, and your haircut is freaky.

But I digress.

Now go back to your local library, Senator, and read the Constitution. Read some constitutional law. Because, as University of Missouri School of Law professor Richard Reuben said in that same NPR story, "This should be a no-brainer for the courts. Under the supremacy clause of the Constitution, a state statute that is in direct conflict with a federal statute is simply invalid."

What the hell?

2010-07-09T19:28:00.000-07:00

I've been having such a great time watching the Harry Potter Weekend on ABCFamily Channel, but there's been one commercial playing over and over that has me completely stumped: the "Falsies" mascara commercial with--for some fucking reason neither AB nor I can figure out--the theme from "Magnum, P.I." playing in the background.

What the fuck does Magnum have to do with "falsie" eyelashes?

I see it now. I get it.

2010-06-16T18:56:00.000-07:00

I just watched Rachel Maddow deliver her edited version of President Obama's big Oval Office speech last night. I see it now. I get it. I see why every lesbian (and lots of men) is in love with Maddow.

Amazing. And hey, I'm okay with a blotchy president who gets a little teary-eyed when she gets mad. At least she'd show some emotion when an entire region gets ruined forever by an oil company.

P.S.--yes, I did a little editing on that screen capture of Maddow. See if you can find it.

Still here

2010-04-20T16:29:00.001-07:00

I'm still alive, though I haven't posted for a while. I've been getting into my new job at MegaCorporationInc, and I'm in Harrisburg all week at a sales training class. But I'm still here.

Like many of you, I've tired of the crap they call "news" on TV and radio, so I haven't been much in the loop on what's happening in the big world. I've kept my focus local of late, on settling back in Pennsylvania after my long time away, on integrating my stuff into the apartment I'm sharing with AB, on learning to live with someone again after a while on my own. It's been great living with AB, who's just plain dreamy in every way! I miss my parents and my family, but I'm so glad to be back in PA.

I'll leave you with this pre-adolescent school picture of me in fourth grade; I kinda missed that little recent trend on Facebook where everyone was using school pics as their profile pics. Oh well. Better late than never:

Just call me "Superfly."

The mirror has two faces

2010-04-01T16:32:00.000-07:00

Don't worry: I don't mean that Streisand movie. Whew!

I mean the way regular people like you and me, and the people all around us at work and the grocery store and places, talk about political figures we don't like.

Remember how, during the GWBush presidency, we all talked about him like he was a dictator, a Hitler who was taking away our rights? And the Patriot Act was the end of our country as we knew it? I won't bother with links; we all remember our posts. We believed we were right, and that we knew what repugs and Faux Nooz and Rush Limpdick and Glenn Prick didn't know: that Bush was basically the antichrist, and we were in big trouble.

Over the last week and a half, I've been temping at a local car dealership, answering the phones and filing and stuff. During this time, I've heard almost the exact same things, word for word, that we used to say about Bush -- only this time, these guys are saying it about Obama. They really think they're right. People who seemed sensible only moments before suddenly start saying things like "Obama is exactly like Hitler!" and "this healthcare bill is the end of our democracy!" "Obama's the antichrist!"

These people list things like "parallels" between Hitler's Third Reich and Obama's presidency (stuff about their talent as public speakers, the takeover of businesses by the government, etc.); you've heard it all on Faux Nooz. The thing is, they all believe they're right too, just like we do. They all think they know the truth, and that the other side is completely wrong and full of idiots, and that NOW we're all screwed because this crazy guy in office is taking our country straight to the gulag or the concentration camp or whatever.

A lot has changed since Bush took office in 2000. But are we in nazi Germany? It doesn't feel like it; no one's coming for my neighbor yet, or for me. All our bloggy jokes about getting picked up and put in Gitmo for trashing Bush/Cheney? Never happened, at least not to any of us.

Who's right? Who's wrong? Do any of us really know what's happening in D.C.? Do we have any control over what happens in D.C., or Afghanistan or Iraq or anyplace outside our own homes and jobs? Is our government even our government anymore? I mean, one minute Chimpy McStagger is signing blank checks to Halliburton for providing our soldiers with contaminated drinking water; the next minute, the Carebear is allowing offshore drilling pretty much everywhere.

Sometimes you just have to say WHAT THE FUCK?, you know?

I've thought before that our government/power elite exist in their own world, completely insulated from the everyday, the mundane concerns you and I live with. Our media is part of their world; they prop up Bush and his wars, give pub to morons like Sarah Palin and the teabaggers, let insane sociopaths like Glenn Prick or Rush Limpdick air their verbal poison.

We--you and me and all our neighbors--are simply the entertainment in this world. That powerful elite populace, all 1% of them, just point and laugh. And can you blame them? Look at the way we're portrayed on TV, on shows like Cops, American Idol, World's Dumbest, 19 Kids and Counting, Faux Nooz's entire schedule. Notice a trend there?

I'm reminded of an Ani DiFranco lyric from her song "Tamburitza Lingua":

TV is, after all, the modern-day Roman Coliseum
Human devastation as mass entertainment
And now millions sit jeering
Collectively cheering
The bloodthirsty hierarchy of the patriarchal arrangement

The power elite are sitting in those seats, making "thumbs down" gestures when it comes to doing anything that might help us get out of there alive. They'd rather we get eaten by the lions, or better yet, that we kill each other.

You watch one channel and you hear how crucial it is that we vote out all the democrats in the next election, or basically the country will collapse. You watch another channel and you hear the same thing, only with voting out republicans.

Who's right? Who's wrong? Does it even matter? Is our innate stupidity and need to put down that which is different from us so powerful that, no matter what side we're on, we're still singing the same songs but just substituting different nouns in the "I hate __________" spots? Are we any different from them?

Or are we just right?

Today's predictions

2010-03-29T17:55:00.000-07:00

Feeling a little future-y tonight, so why not make some predictions?

1. All these currently insured people bitching about the health care bill, claiming it's going to hurt them in all kinds of crazy ways, will find out that not much is going to change for them (unless they lose their jobs).

2. All us uninsured people are going to be able to afford to go to the doctor when we're really sick.

3. Pope Prada isn't going to get in any kind of trouble, nor is he in danger of losing his job, no matter what revelations surface about his part in child-molesting-priest cover-ups.

4. What the hell--Cowboys to the NFC division title game, where they'll lose.

5. The Lady Bears of Baylor will win the NCAA national title. They've got heart.

Anything to add?

So bring on the healthcare!

2010-03-22T18:29:00.001-07:00

Hoyer, Pelosi, and the Boner

Imagine a country where artists, freelancers, the unemployed -- in short, any citizen -- can have health coverage. They don't have to go the emergency room to get healthcare; they will be able to pay a certain amount (helped by the government, in the case of non-super-rich people) and be guaranteed healthcare. And yeah, it's kind-of a drag that this healthcare can't just be free, but then again, when the country has a deficit that's fast approaching thirteen TRILLION dollars, then hey -- I'm willing to help out and chip in for my healthcare, you know?

Imagine a country where a presidential candidate says he's going to get something done -- something that will prove to be the centerpiece of his presidency -- and he gets it done.

Bush's centerpiece? The Patriot Act.

Obama's centerpiece? Healthcare for us all.

And while the Patriot Act, which clearly violated many of the freedoms guaranteed to us by our Constitution, is still around, the healthcare reform legislation hasn't even been signed into law yet and already, Texas, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, both Dakotas, Florida, Virginia, Washington, Utah, Nebraska, and Alabama (so far) will be filing a lawsuit challenging the constitutionality of, as an attorney claimed today on NPR, "taxing" U.S. citizens for just "living" by requiring people to pay a little for healthcare. The Virginia AG claims, "'If a person decides not to buy health insurance, that person by definition is not engaging in commerce.... If you are not engaging in commerce, how can the federal government regulate you?"' Uh, what?

Oh, and don't forget every idiot's favorite constitutionality argument, "state's rights." Those are also being infringed on, dammit, according to the more wacko AGs out there. Right.

The Kucinich Zone

2010-03-13T17:38:00.000-08:00

You're traveling through another dimension -- a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. That's a signpost up ahead: your next stop: the Kucinich Zone!

Let's imagine the wondrous land, the amazing dimension of sight and sound and mind that we'd have if Dennis Kucinich (D-Awesomeness) were in charge.

1. No more war. Kucinich has been trying to stop the money-pit wars in the Middle East since they began. Does anyone listen? Nope. But think how much more money--and how many fewer dead soldiers, Iraqis, and Afghanis--we'd have on our hands if we'd never gone to Iraq or Afghanistan. Kucinich just proposed stopping additional funding for the Afghanistan war and bringing our troops home by the end of the year. Predictably, it failed. But without Kucinich, would anyone in Washington even be talking about an end to this insanity?

2. Single-payer option national health care. Does anyone in the House believe in fighting for us besides Kucinich?

3. Cheney impeached.

4. A sustainable energy policy.

5. No bailouts for billionaires.

6. Cheney impeached. Oh sweet jeebus, the words are like music.

7. We'd still have a hot First Lady.
8. Cheney impeached. Sigh.

Some words to the wise

2010-02-26T19:19:00.000-08:00

Today was my last day at my temp job at the behemoth-megabank-which-shall-remain-nameless. The job ended up being an interesting and educational experience, but I was glad to be done with it. I do want to tell you about a few of the things I've learned. HOWEVER, I am NOT employed by or associated with VISA, nor am I speaking in any official capacity as an agent of any bank and/or business. These are just some tips I learned that I consider valuable to know, and I want to share them with you. (I hope that's enough of a disclaimer to prevent my getting sued or arrested. I hope.)
I worked in checkcard disputes, handling cases dealing with charges to people's debit cards or checkcards--the kind of card the bank gives you (usually labeled with VISA or MasterCard, depending on the bank) that is connected to your checking account. It was nice to help people out when they'd been unfairly charged and gotten into trouble through no fault of their own.

Still, it seemed like we were always seeing disputes against the same old merchants--Internet merchants like those "make money on the internet!" and "Internet Bizkit" places, or all those sites that sell tooth-whitening kits, or the many software download sellers. A lot of these online merchants are scammers; not all, but many. You'll click OK on something, and then they'll hit your card for $1.99, and then before you can cancel that "trial membership," they've hit your card again for $79.99 about six times, and the transactions are set up as recurring billings, so each month, you're getting tagged bunches of times for fees and stuff. And half the time, the customer has never even heard of the company they're being billed by. That got old really fast, man. There's a lot of bad business happening on those Internets.

I saw scams and stuff happen every day, and it was so disheartening. People will sign up for one thing; then they'll get all these pop-up offers for other products and they'll think they're clicking on "cancel," (at least that's what they always tell us), but suddenly they're getting billed by six different places for phantom services and memberships.There's usually no working phone number to call, and so they call their bank in desperation after losing sometimes hundreds of dollars in charges and NSF fees.

The lesson? Be careful what web sites you enter your credit card information on, people! I always found myself saying, "Stay off the internet if you can't keep your debit card number to yourself!" I usually don't buy anything online unless it's through Amazon; I trust them. I never saw one dispute against them in the entire time I worked at the bank. So if I can't get it on Amazon, I won't buy it online. All those TV commercials where you can buy your ShamWow or your magic litter box or whatever online -- just go to Walgreen's or someplace; they usually have an "as seen on TV!" section, and you can buy the item right there and not worry about who's scamming onto your checkcard number.

And it's not just internet merchants who'll screw up checkcard transactions. Today, I handled a case where a woman had gone to her hair salon, paid the bill for $44, and left. No big deal. The merchant charged her $44, she signed the slip, and she thought she was done. That's usually how it works, right? Well, not this time. Somehow, the transaction went through twice on that day, then at least once per day for the next two days before she noticed she was hundreds of dollars short when she went to balance her checking account. (Checkcards are connected to your checking account, so it's all the same thing--only with your checkcard, you have certain consumer protections granted to you by VISA--or Mastercard, whatever your bank uses.)

So she called in, filed disputes, and today I pulled up her cases. She'd caught most of the first duplicate postings (that's what we call it when the merchant charges your card more than once for the same purchase), but there were MORE charges she didn't even know about yet. I called her and told her about them, and we set up some more cases, each time issuing her a provisional credit for the amount of the charge so she wouldn't be missing that money because of the merchant's errors (something that not all banks do, but you should look into whether your bank does that when you dispute a charge--it's nice, especially when make a big purchase like an airline ticket or something and you get double-billed or something). She was charged a total of nine times before I was able to block her card for fraud and order her a new checkcard.

The crazy thing? Each transaction had the same transaction date (the date they actually swiped the card) but different posting days (the day the bank actually takes the money from your account). How is that possible, you ask? Who knows. That's e-banking for you. It's a mystery.

The moral of this story is to watch your checking account history like a hawk. Just the other day, I got gas (pay-at-the-pump), used my checkcard as credit like always, and went on my merry way. The next time I went to balance my account, I noticed that the transaction had posted twice! But I had only gassed up once! Lucky for me, the merchant had caught the error and issued a credit to my account via the card number. All this happened without my even realizing it, and I check my account like every other day! Good thing I wasn't down to a few pennies in my account, or I'd have incurred some NSF fees.

Most times, the merchant doesn't catch an error like this, so it's up to you to watch for duplicate postings. Another important thing: if the merchant hadn't caught the error and instead of using my card as "credit," I'd used my PIN number to make the transaction, I would've been out of luck if somehow the computer banking network or whatever (it's voodoo, man) had charged me twice for the same tank of gas. A PIN transaction is just like cash; you have no chargeback rights if the merchant makes an error. If you're lucky, you can show the error to the merchant and he'll fix it. But if not--you have no recourse. ALWAYS use your card as credit.

Here's another important thing: Merchants are NOT ALLOWED, under their merchant agreement with VISA, to charge extra for checkcard/credit card transactions. So those gas stations that charge a certain price if you pay cash and a higher price if you pay with a card? They are violating the terms of their agreement with VISA, and if you threaten to report them (and I mean don't budge on this! and do it BEFORE you let them run your card!) to your VISA and/or your bank, they should back down and charge you the cash price. Same goes for those "minimum amount to use credit/checkcard" signs you see at lots of restaurants and convenience stores; that too is a violation of their agreement with VISA. If they take VISA, they HAVE to treat your checkcard or credit card the same as if you were paying with cash. Otherwise, it's a fine up to $10,000 per occurrence from VISA. Just run that by 'em.

If they still don't budge, LEAVE. Don't pay a penny more, don't agree to a minimum purchase amount, if you're paying with your VISA-labeled card.

Oh -- one important point on the whole watching your checking account history like a hawk: don't mistake holds (often designated as "pending" in your online account history) for actual posted transactions. Many times, especially when you go out to eat at restaurants, the merchant will run your card once for the amount of the meal, and then run it again for the amount of the meal plus tip. Usually, when they're counting out their tills and balancing the day's transactions and stuff, they'll void out the extra hold (either the one with the tip, the one without the tip, or both--and there might even be a third one with your actual tip amount added in). Usually they void those other holds out. But--not always. You'll have to dispute those.

And here's a crazy thing: if you were to check your account online while you were still at the restaurant, you'd see all those holds--all listed as "pending"--and your account would actually show a balance minus all those hold amounts, as though you'd actually paid for your meal however many times! Again, don't ask me why this happens or how -- it's voodoo! But it does. It's kinda like when you deposit a check and it takes a couple of days to clear before you can touch that money. Anyway, if the restaurant does their accounting right, they'll delete all but your actual transacted amount and those holds will be released and that money will once again be available to you. But until then, it's "pending" or on hold. Watch the holds, but don't think they're the same as posts. They'll usually just vanish by the next time you check online.

Once again, the moral: watch your account history.

A few notes on those "consumer protections" I mentioned earlier. Now, the bank I worked for used VISA for all their checkcards, so that's all I know about.

1. Any purchase you make with a VISA-labeled card is usually refundable for 14 days after the transaction date.

2. If a merchant tries to tell you a VISA purchase is not refundable or an item is not returnable, etc., look at your receipt. Does it have that fact stated on the receipt? If so, is it right there near your signature, or is it on the back of the receipt in tiny print? Or maybe the merchant has it on a sign somewhere near the cash register? Remember this: that non-refundable stuff has to be right near your signature in order for it to be binding. If it's on the back of the receipt or not on the receipt at all, you have every right to return an item or cancel a reservation or whatever. Your signature is your agreement to abide by whatever terms the merchant decides--but the signature has to be right near those terms in order to show that you agreed to the terms.

3. Plane tickets? Not refundable, not transferable. You're out of luck there.

4. Hotel charges for things like smoking in the room, damages to the room, missing towels, etc.? Unless you sign a receipt for the add-on charges, you can dispute them as unauthorized. When you register for a hotel, you're agreeing to pay for a room. Charges they decide to add on after you've checked out and left (and thus cannot consent to be billed to your checkcard) can be disputed by you as unauthorized. Don't get me wrong: You still the owe the hotel for towels if you steal their towels. But you have the right to decide when and how you're going to pay for those towels. Also note that in order to dispute a charge as unauthorized, the bank will usually have to block your card for fraud and issue you a replacement card. So bear that in mind before you go calling all sorts of things "unauthorized."

5. Rental car places have certain things they CAN add on to your bill--because their contracts state it and you've usually had to initial things on the contract like refueling fees, traffic tickets you get while in possession of the car, or late-return charges. However, they can't charge you for damages to the vehicle, smoking in the vehicle, etc. without your consent. Again, you do owe them the money, but you decide when and how to pay it.

6. When you do see something funny on your account history, call the merchant first. Do whatever you have to -- show them a printout of your duplicate posting or whatever -- to resolve the issue yourself. If the merchant is a dick about it, THEN go to your bank. VISA requires you to make a good-faith effort to resolve the issue yourself before you bug them (via your bank) about it. When you go to the merchant, go armed with your receipt, a printout from your online banking, or whatever -- take the necessary information to show the merchant that he/she has made a mistake.

7. If you're paying a bill by phone or online (remotely), any error your make -- entering an extra zero, paying the wrong merchant (it happens all the time!), etc. -- is NOT disputable. That's your error, and the bank can't help you with it because you participated in the transaction.

8. SAVE YOUR RECEIPTS. For everything! Cash, credit, debit cards, checks, whatever -- save your receipts until you've seen the charge clear on your online banking, AND you've allowed a little more time for any e-banking goblins to make merry with your checkcard number. I save my receipts for the month; once I've seen them clear and the month is over, then I'll get rid of them.

9. As many disputes as we dealt with each day, they comprised only a tiny fraction of the number of checkcard transactions that go through without a hitch each day. Until that weird pay-at-the-pump thing happened, I'd NEVER seen anything wrong on my bank account. Of course, I didn't used to check it quite so carefully as I do now! I would just say stuff like, "Hmmm. I don't remember that charge... but there it is, so I must've made it!" I look back at myself and hang my head in shame.

Take care of your money!

In which I renounce my Jewishness

2010-02-25T15:54:00.000-08:00

First, a little background: For many many years now, I've told anyone who would listen that I'm Jewish. Why? because I like the Jewish faith. Their history, their traditions, their mystique--it's really interesting to me, so one day I asked a Jewish friend of mine (a Sabra Jew, no less!) if I could be Jewish too. She may have been humoring me (maybe), but she said I could be a Jew if two other Jews said yes too! Forget that whole mother/father issue; I could be a Jew!

In my travels over the years since then, I eventually found two other Jewish friends who said sure, I could be a Jew if I really wanted to, so since then I've called the Jews "my people." I'm not exactly a devout or orthodox Jew; I don't eat Kosher or go to temple or anything. But I read a lot about my people and our struggle, and I identify with them. Elie Weisel is a true hero. I went to the Holocaust Museum, I study, I learn. I wrap my presents in "Happy Hannukah" paper. Every year at Hannukah, I used to ask Kat for a dreidel! (She and our daughter Em did not recognize my Jewishness, by the way, so I'm still waiting for that dreidel. And the menorah. Hmph.)

So today, as I'm driving home, I'm listening to NPR and I hear a report about the assassination of Hamas leader Mahmud al-Mabhuh. I'd read recently that Princess Sparklepony favorite Tzipi Livni has been saying things like "The fact that a terrorist was killed, and it doesn't matter if it was in Dubai or Gaza, is good news to those fighting terrorism." Okay, I see--so we want terrorists dead. I understand that.

But is Hamas a terrorist organization? Have we established that as undeniable fact? Yes, the guy leads a group that regularly fires missiles into Jerusalem. But the Israelis are always firing missiles into the Palestinian areas, not to mention setting up illegal settlements on land that isn't theirs but the Palestinians.

And sure, the U.S. considers Hamas a terrorist organization but, in my opinion, the Bush-led U.S. was a terrorist government (and we still have Abu Ghraib and Gitmo to deal with, by the bye; they haven't gone away), so what does that label really mean? Sarah Palin has called President Obama a terrorist, so really--what does that label mean? What's the difference between someone who's just trying to defend himself and his people and someone who's actively trying to hurt innocent people and bring down their governments?

I've listened to the back and forth as the hugely outgunned and outmanned Hamas-led Palestinians fight for a bit of their homeland against the military behemoth of Israel. Who's the terrorist in that fight? Quite frankly, I think it depends on your point of view.

So back to the NPR story. The reporter interviewed a few Israelis who are actually proud and telling jokes about the assassination. People who happen to have a vague resemblance to the people who've been accused of being involved with the assassination are living it up, enjoying their look-alike celebrity.

Um... someone's dead. Have the Israeli people really gone so far down the "eye for an eye" path that they cheer when others are killed? They tell jokes about it?

Imagine that some U.S. operatives killed an important Iranian, someone who wasn't in a government position but was nonetheless the visible leader of an Irani movement. Would we Americans laugh and regard those U.S. operatives as heroes? Would we tell jokes about the assassination? Imagine we killed effing Fidel Castro. Would you or I really make up jokes about that?

I think there are a few Americans who might laugh and celebrate such an act. But I think they'd be likely to have a sticker like this on their gas-sucking truck:

and they'd probably look like this:or this:
So, as much as I've enjoyed lighting up my little Jewish candles and wearing my Happy Hannukah socks, I'm not so thrilled with my people right now.

I just don't know if I want to be associated anymore with people who would cheer a political assassination, no matter whether the victim "deserves" it or not.

P.S.--I hope none of my Jewish readers are offended by my desire to be Jewish and calling Jews "my people." And I hope no one's offended by my daring to question the actions of Israel and Israelis. It's just how I feel.

Seen at work returns!

2010-02-17T16:21:00.000-08:00

After a long hiatus during which I couldn't find my USB connector for my phone, I bring you an action-packed Seen at Work!

First up: It probably doesn't come as a surprise to you that bank workers generate a lot of documents containing highly personal information--things like your bank account numbers, your balance, specific transaction details, your debit card numbers, etc. Each day, I probably generate at least seven or eight such pieces of paper that need to be shredded. We have big shred bins with locks on them, and we have big shredders around the building in case you feel a DIY shred moment coming on.

Still, who would've known we'd have the actual shredder that tried to eat Whoopie's character in Jumping Jack Flash?

You can even see a piece of her dress--the one that gets caught in the shredder!--still on the shredder! Every time I pass, I remember my mom's favorite scene, the Diana Ross "You Can't Hurry Love" lip-sync scene! It's obvious they spared no expense at my bank. I'll be watching for other movie memorabilia around the building. Maybe I'll find Obi-wan's light saber (for scanning MICR codes on checks?) or the evil copy machine from Office Space.

Next, we have this:This was seen in my work parking lot, but it counts. Other stickers on the (of course) mega-truck included "Rick Perry 2010," "Freedom isn't free," and one of those Calvin (of Calvin and Hobbes) rip-offs in which Calvin pees on some other truck logo. Needless to say, I think this sticker pretty much tells you all you need to know about the driver of said mega-truck.

On that note, it seems like a good time to tell you that I'm leaving Texas! I've finally scraped together enough money to move back to Pennsylvania so I can be with my girlfriend. I'm really looking forward to being back up north, which is something I didn't think I'd be saying. But after the California FAIL, it'll be nice to get back to the last place I truly called "home." I'll be driving up the first week in March. Then it'll be mad job-huntin', much drinking of the sorely missed Yuengling Lager, and tons o' canoodlin' with AB. Can't wait!

Congratulations, Saints!

2010-02-07T18:57:00.000-08:00

Finally, no more 'Aints. Not a dry eye in the house watching Brees tear up while holding his son.

R. I. P., Mr. Salinger

2010-01-28T17:25:00.001-08:00

The Onion, of course, has the best take on the death of author J.D. Salinger.

Hope there are no more phonies where you are, Mr. Salinger.

Multiple meanings

2010-01-26T17:06:00.000-08:00

1.The Four Seasons in Dallas
2. The Four Seasons in Dallas
3. The Four Seasons in Dallas: Hot, tornado, hotter than hell itself, ice storm.

My Left Foot

2010-01-18T17:07:00.000-08:00

Post yours!

Fun with the Googles

2010-01-12T20:06:00.000-08:00

So I was bored and had a few minutes to kill, so I googled the phrase "photos of delia guzman." (yes, that's my full name)

The googles came up with this lovely grandma (neato!) in a youtoobs video--from someplace in the world called Larmahue. Where is that?

By far, the best photo result, however, comes from that Bing, however; check how hot I look in Peru!

I may just have found another foreign TV beauty for Matty Boy to love, even if she doesn't look too tall. She does kinda have that Buffy look about her, though. Hot.

Christmas goodness, Oakland style

2009-12-30T22:15:00.000-08:00

I got a welcome phone call from my pal Matty Boy the other day, during which he informed me that there were some Christmas goodies coming my way. What a mensch he is: He told me he was giving gifts to those less fortunate than himself; sadly, I qualified.

Gift #1 was something I've wanted forever: the entire catalog of recordings of Matty Boy's and Padre Mickey's band The Wonders of Science! I'm completely bowled over by this tune, and the rest of the songs on the CD are just as good. Every time I listen, I feel like I'm back in college in my old dorm room, not-reading a bunch of literature for my English classes and wondering what it would be like to be an out lesbian. Sigh. Those were the days.

Gift #2 was something Matty Boy has been touting forever: a copy of the Dr. Horrible's Sing-along Blog DVD! I had planned to watch it tonight (I've never seen even a second of it), but I ended up spending hours creating a new logo and header for my birdy blog... in Microsoft Paint. Do you know how hard it is to create graphics in Paint? Like trying to perform calculus with Sarah Palin's brain, my friends. Just like that. Someday, I hope to have PhotoShop and Illustrator again... someday. (Did you know I was a graphic designer from 1997-2002?)

Now it's well past midnight, nigh on one in the a.m., and I've got to wake up at six. Shit.

Just what I've been hoping for

2009-12-29T20:19:00.000-08:00

Please offer any "moodlifting messages" in comments.

more Seen at Work

2009-12-24T19:14:00.000-08:00

So many things, so little time....

There's something not quite right here... I just can't put my finger on it... something... Let's see: the good old traditional Candy J's are there, and the upside-down gay triangles are there... That's Christmas-y, right? What? What's wrong? What?
I would be happy to definitely use all the certainly wonderful ways we're supposed to gladly "please" our fabulous customers when we're on the phone; it's My Pleasure! So I just need to ask you some fantastic questions to verify your excellent identity...

Finally, I ask you:
What the hell?

Oh wait--of course! I forgot to orient it correctly--it's a vertical: Oh yeah!

Wait...

Seen at work

2009-12-03T20:12:00.000-08:00

I call it "Cloud Shitty."

Someone-dammit.

2009-12-01T17:37:00.000-08:00

I'm in and out of consciousness right now, as I am on some painkillers for my tooth extraction earlier today, but I think I just heard President Obama say he's sending 30K more troops to Viet[Afghanistan]nam.

But then he's pulling everybody outta there in 2011.

Because that makes as much sense as the "surge" and Mission Accomplished.

Shit.

Seen at work

2009-11-29T21:12:00.001-08:00

There must've been some kind of Starving Artists Art Show in the area when they purchased the art for my work building. Little wonder these artists were starving.

Seen at work

2009-11-18T16:58:00.000-08:00

I've decided to start a new series here on the bloggy: "Seen at Work." The place where I work is filled with strange artwork, odd decorations, inane instructional postings, and other such noteworthy items, and I wouldn't want to be selfish and keep all these sights (and sounds) to myself. Besides, there's no one at my work who would appreciate these things like you would; everyone else just seems to ignore these things. I've decided that Texans, at least the San Antonio variety, are weird and not very observant.

I'm dying to hear your comments, if only to help me decide whether I'm the only one who thinks this shit is strange.

I'll kick the new series off with a double feature.

First, I present this item (rather a common one down here in San Antonio, I've noticed), found in the restrooms:I've seen these before from time to time in other cities in which I've lived, but it seems like every public restroom in San Antonio has these. Do they really protect you from anything, besides the knowledge that unless you use them, you're placing your bare buttocks on the exact same surface that lots of other people do? (If you think about that for even a second, you just might start carrying a box of these around with you.)

I keep wondering if they protect one from the errant herpes sore or something. Maybe I'm just being obtuse; any public health officials want to share? My mom always told us to lay triple thicknesses of TP on the seat before using a public toilet, but these things are really thin!

Now, OF COURSE I use them whenever I use the restroom, though I always rip the inner circle loose so I don't make splashy sounds.... You know what I'm talking about. But really--do they protect you from anything?

Next, in the "Art" category:I posted this horror on my birdy blog yesterday and so far, all the commenters have ignored it. I trust you guys will find the words that must've escaped my bird-loving pals. I call this one "My child has terrifying hallucinations, and sometimes he commits them to paper."

In the coming days, you'll see more photos of the "art" from my building; there must've been a sale at the local sanitarium or detox ward.

Sick of swine flu

2009-11-13T18:57:00.000-08:00

It's a bit late in the game to be bitching about the media furor over the H1N1 (or Hee-nee, as my mom calls it, as though the 1s are really Is) flu, but I've been out of blogulation for a while, and I saw something today that just stuck in my craw. Picture a giant electronic-lighted billboard flashing the following:

TOWN HALL MEETING: H1N1 VIRUS AND VACCINE INFORMATION!

Because that's what we need a town hall meeting on: the effing H1N1 virus. Yeah. Not any of those other things like that bid for the nuke facility here in town, the bid that's increased by millions of dollars lately, and that got a couple of board members canned for influence peddling. Not that. And not the fact that healthcare's in the toilet and Congress is screwing us over even more about it. Nope. Not even the dearth of jobs vs. the ridiculously high number of people applying for each and every one of them. Why's that important?

Nope, we're having a town hall meeting about that dumb flu vaccine. Even though regular flu viruses kill more people each year than H1N1. And even though the vaccine probably doesn't even work.

Sheesh.

I was at Tengrain's blog a little while ago and started laughing my ass off while watching A Flock of Seagulls' "Wishing," which I thought was an AMAZING song when I was in high school/early college. The lyrics are awful, but the music is okay; the video is probably in the same league as other 80s high-larious classics like Asia's "Heat of the Moment" and Scandal's "The Warrior."

While I was hunting down those gems on the yootoobs, I came across one of my all-time favorite songs, The Specials' "A Message to You, Rudy." Go forth and enjoy!

Hey folks!

2009-11-01T08:57:00.000-08:00

I've now been in San Antonio for a month. I'm enjoying my temp job; it's interesting and the people are nice--not to mention the fact that it's nice to have an income again. Still looking for a real permanent job too.

I haven't had a whole lot of time to access all your blogs lately; I have to use my dad's computer for my online fun, and I can only get online after work--in between helping my mom cook dinner, giving Niblet some lovin', and talking to AB back in Pennsylvania. Oh, how I miss being able to blog at work!

So don't take my absence personally. I still love and miss you all, in case you were wondering.

I haven't been keeping up with the news either. I keep hearing about how the economy's improving and San Antonio's the third-most recession-proof job market in the country, but I'm still looking for mine. The dearth of posts will likely continue until I figure out where I'm going and how I'll get there.

Hello, I'm alive, and I'm employed...

2009-10-14T18:07:00.000-07:00

...at least temporarily!

Sorry for the long vacation away from the blog, but I've been trying to find work, focus on the birds, and learn how to live with my parents again after 27 years out of their house. Thank you all so much for your kind comments and for coming back to the old bloggy. I don't know how much I'll be doing on this blog; politics has just become incredibly frustrating and joy-sucking.

The cool thing is living with two hard-core democrats like my Mom and Pop. We now take turns yelling at the TV talking heads; it's so cool to hear them say a lot of what all of us have been saying all these years! Who knew there were still a few hardy dems in Texas, other than those Texans on my blogroll!?

I've been here about two weeks now. I've applied for a bunch of interesting jobs--marketing, sales, administrative assistant, etc.--but I finally got a hit when I went to (of all places) the same temp agency I registered with in California. I'll be working in a call center resolving something or other at a certain huge national/world banking center. It's outbound calls, but at least I won't be selling anything. And at least I'll be making some money for a while; it's a temp appointment that'll last until sometime before Thanksgiving.

Meanwhile, I'll keep plugging away, trying to get a "real" job, hoping someone likes my resume enough to give me a call.

Again, thanks so much for your support during my "migration" around the country.

Plans

2009-09-18T22:23:00.000-07:00

And so it has come to this: if I can't get a job (or at least a promising interview) before the end of the month, I have to leave California.

It's not the ideal plan, I'll admit. Many people tell me that it often takes months to find work, especially out here in budget-wrecked California, but any fool could see that staying out here much longer is financially unwise. I've never been without work for so long at one stretch, at least not while trying to find work. It seems that things here in the Golden State are tougher than I imagined and while, as they say, "hindsight's 20/20," I am beginning to think that my desire for new lifebirds and greener pastures blinded me to just how easy I had it in PA and how long my savings (and loans) would last.

Yes, I was tired of the Pennsylvania snow.

And yes, I wanted to go someplace I'd always dreamed of living.

And oh sure, I felt like I didn't really "belong" in a state like Pennsylvania, where I was perhaps one of maybe ten hispanics in Centre County (I'm being generous; I only knew of me and my friend Ignacio) and where I'd only gone because of a now-defunct relationship.

AB keeps telling me that I can't look back now and judge my decisionmaking after it's turned out to be a total dud; if that were possible (or wise), no one would ever take a chance on anything. Or even get out of bed. But it's hard not to think about the fact that if I'd stayed, I'd still have a good job and I'd be with my girlfriend.

Must. Not. Think. About. That.

So where will I go, you ask? One of two places: Texas or Pennsylvania. BUT... the only way I can go back to PA is if I already have a job waiting for me.
...What, you think I didn't learn a lesson from this whole "Hey, I'm sure I'll find a job in a state where everyone's being laid off! Great idea!" fiasco?

I am furiously looking for work now through the same crap job-seeker engines (Monster, CareerBuilder, SnagAJob, etc.) that have failed to net me more than one interview out here in sunny NoCal. Don't think I've missed the irony of such a situation. At least The University has its own job Web site, though there's no telling the snail's pace at which The University might travel.
(Okay, okay, Mr. Unnecessary-capital-letter-policeman, I'm only capping "the university" out of respect! ...well, and a little karmic finger-crossing. Shhh.)

I know two weeks isn't a lot of time to find work anywhere, but this is the plan I worked out with my sainted father and brother, who are loaning me yet more money to pay the really late bills and buy food and stuff.

Yes, I'm 45 and still getting bailed out by my father. Perhaps I should run for president. I hear this kind of thing worked out great for the last guy.

I'm still trying to follow up on my California applications and apply for other positions, but at this point it's almost stupid to keep trying. I lost count after 60 of how many jobs I'd applied for, but I did get one interview (on my birthday, no less) that was going really well until they told me that although they loved my skills and experience, they didn't know when they'd be able to make an offer, much less hire me. Budget problems. Low sales. Downward trends. You get the picture. (I should've remembered that the last time I had a good birthday, I was in 9th grade and my dad was picking up all my little geeky friends and taking us to SkateLand for a big night of rollerskating to "Dancing Queen." It's like a curse, my birthday. Every stinkin' year.)

At any rate, AB is being really supportive, and we're both hoping that I can at least go back to PA and be with her. But again, I can't go there without a job, so I'll continue to hit the Interwebs super hard over the next week or so. This whole job-search is like a job in itself, a really boring one where I'm forced to write cover letter after cover letter, tailored to the specific job duties and my overwhelming ambition to work at Company X!, and fill out endless job-search-engine registration forms. I've gotten it down to a science, copying and pasting stuff into the blanks, but it's still mind-numbingly boring and soul-crushing.

The other night I couldn't sleep and decided to read a book I hadn't read before (those who know me know that I LOVE to re-read my favorite books, especially when I can't sleep). I noticed a book I'd gotten at a recent book sale, Barbara Ehrenreich's Bait and Switch, in which she "goes undercover" again, this time not as a minimum-wage worker (Nickel and Dimed) but as a middle-management-type white-collar jobseeker, applying for hundreds of jobs over the course of six months, paying for an image consultant, enduring life-coaching from several rather life-challenged individuals, attending endless "networking events," and ending up with nothing -- not even one interview.

Given my circumstances and my now quite fragile job-seeker self-esteem, reading this particular book might, just might!, have been a bad idea.

Table for Sisyphus, party of one! Table for Sisyphus!

I've really enjoyed California. It's beautiful, for one thing--you should check out the pics on my birdy blog--and I've gotten lots of new birds for my lifelist. (If you know what that is, you might be a geek.) The weather is lovely. But it's hard to enjoy the beauty when you know you have no job, no income, and not much hope.

- - - - - - -
On a lighter note, I'm excited to report that I'll be driving into Oakland on Sunday to visit Matty Boy. We're planning to bird at Lake Merritt and then go watch the Cowboys game. I'm totally pumped!

Eat your hearts out, bloggy gals!

Oh, I just thought of something: I haven't told him this bit of news yet, so if you're reading this post, Matty Boy, I'll give you more details on Sunday.

Meanwhile, if anyone knows of a job in the Rohnert Park area... anyone? anyone?

"No matter how bad it gets, it can always get worse."

2009-09-03T19:37:00.000-07:00

Those were some sage words of advice from my dad one time when things weren't looking so good for me. I'm sure he meant them in the most positive and encouraging way possible, but they always just made me sad.

So you know I'm not having much luck with the job search, thanks to that whiny post from earlier today, but Matty Boy just called (which did cheer me quite a bit) and after we'd discussed how much I LOVED Joss Whedon's Dollhouse, he gave me some bad news: Princess Sparkle Pony has stopped blogging.

I remember finding the Princess through a googles search for god-only-knows-what, probably something on Condi, and I just about burst my liver open, laughing. The Ex didn't much appreciate the Princess' wry humor, but I thought it was quite possibly the funniest thing I'd ever seen -- a whole blog devoted to that crazy Condi's hairdo and such. Brilliant.

I was then introduced to the hilariously smart comments of such future bloggy pals as Matty Boy, FranIAm, and KarenZipdrive, all giants in the field who've gone on to make their own great bloggy contributions. Even I started blogging, and not just about birds!

I could go on, but it's just too sad. Suffice it to say that Princess, you will be missed.

God, how I hate looking for a job

2009-09-03T12:53:00.000-07:00

I've been out here in the Golden State for almost a month now, and I'm still looking for a job. The longest it's ever taken me to find a job in my whole life (and I've had lots!) is two weeks, but we're coming on a month here.

I still say California is beautiful. I've enjoyed seeing new birds and new places, drinking new wines and decent tapwater. But this endless job-searching is making me hate life.

I started out applying to editorial positions -- there were a few, actually! -- then I went to the administrative assistant jobs. Now I'm filling out apps to be a assistant manager at "THE HUT" (Pizza Hut, for all us non-hip people) and completing questionnaires with questions like "When I go into a restaurant, right away I begin thinking about ways they could do things better." Fortunately, I could answer "DEFINITELY" on that one, as it's rare that a restaurant doesn't piss me off in some way. When asked about why I like coffee (on the Starbuck's app), I talked about how it brings people together and you can learn about it, like wines, only without the big wine price tag. I also added that even people who don't drink coffee know why others do. (I just left it at that -- mysterious, no?)

I'm exhausted by all this filling out of online apps and paper apps and stuff. And nary a word from any of the places yet. AB told me that most places work on a different time scale than I do; they take a couple of weeks or whatever, and then they get around to calling for interviews. But I'm broke, people! Hurry up! I can do your job, trust me!

So that's what's going on in my real life. In my birdy life, I'm having a blast. My life list is up to 212, and I've got all sorts of great pictures and stuff. The other day, I even went to one of those "gravity hill" type places near here and I swear to you, it looked like the car was rolling UP the hill backwards! So that's all cool.

What's not cool is paying $212 to register my vehicle. TWO HUNDRED TWELVE DOLLARS? I asked the DMV lady if that was for the lifetime of the car, but she said no, it's every year. In Texas, it was like 60 bucks. PA, about the same. What the hell is it about this place? How can the state be broke if they're charging each of the kabillion cars out here 212 bucks each year? That's messed up, man.

I'm trying to figure out how I'll know when/if it's time to just pack it in and go back to PA or something. I mean, what's the cut-off? I could borrow more money, though I don't want to. But I don't want to give up and start driving back, only to get a bunch of callbacks for interviews when I'm hitting Nebraska or someplace. But what's the cut-off?

a random thought

2009-08-27T00:45:00.000-07:00

I once heard, "the rulers are not of the ruled." Truer words were never spoken; this truism explains so much about why our government is screwing us daily.

But today I started to wonder: just where DO the rulers come from? Old-money families? If that were true, Tom "Hot Tub Tom" DeLay wouldn't have had to make a living killing bugs. Power cabals? Please--like Darling Lindsey was ever part of anything powered besides a Folsom Street Fair Fucking Machine. (and no, I'm not inserting links--my Mac is old and I have to type out the HTML, and I'm too lazy and tired to do that right now)

So just where DO these sorry excuses for people come from? Ted Kennedy came from a rich powerful family, but he NEVER abandoned his liberal leanings or turned his back on the poor and powerless who believed in him. So where did these republicans come from?

Gone to Texas, baby

2009-08-19T22:19:00.000-07:00

Photo credit, even though I believe it's real and not an urban myth!

...for my sister's wedding. Be back next Wednesday!

(I tried to find a YouSeriesofTubes version of the Texas classic "Gone to Texas, Baby" by Terry Allen, but I couldn't. Sorry!)

Note: Crossposted at the birdy blog.

East meets West at the East West

2009-08-18T17:03:00.000-07:00

Well, Matty Boy and Karlacita! had lovely lunch today at Santa Rosa's kick-ass East West Restaurant. I had the Falafel Wrap which was HUGE, Karlacita! had the Falafel Plate, and Matty Boy split some Pumpkin Soup with his sis and ate a Denver Omelette. A great time was had by all, and we have pictures to prove it!

Note the lack of a picture with Matty Boy and me in it; I was temporarily sillified and just forgot. The poses were based on the "Grecian urns" routine in one of my favorite musicals (and obviously one of Karlacita!'s as well because the poses were her idea), The Music Man.

Special bonuses: intelligent conversation! scary squash that's like a foot and a half long and tomatoes from Karlacita!'s garden! The first season of Joss Whedon's Dollhouse, on loan from Matty Boy! Pretty cool!

Matty's done his own post, complete with a picture of me and him tagethah, bruthah, and much better text!

P.S.--got carried away with all the !!! -- thanks, Karlacita!.

Breaking Texan news!

2009-08-17T19:50:00.000-07:00

Along with such big names as Melissa Joan Hart (Sabrina the Teenage Witch), Macy Gray (that singer with the raspy voice), Kathy Ireland (model), Ashley Hamilton (multi-untalented Shannon Doherty cast-off), Donny Osmond (professional has-been), and Michael Irvin (Super Bowl-winning former Dallas Cowboys wide receiver and cokehead-turned-preacher/lecturer), former effing Speaker of the effing House Tom DeLay (crook) will be tripping the lights fantastic on ABC's Dancing with the Stars.

So to all of you who thought his career was washed up after all those inconvenient little legal troubles and stuff: look who's laughing now!

Today, Dancing with the Stars; tomorrow, the world! Dignity, people! Dignity!

Blogger Meet-up preview!

2009-08-17T19:18:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow, I'm meeting the expert 'splainer of all things, Matty Boy of Lotsa 'Splainin' to Do, AND his sister, hilarious commenter Karlacita! in Santa Rosa! We'll be lunching at the East West Restaurant, which looks like a lovely place.

Pics and dish tomorrow after the meet-up!

Overwhelmed

2009-08-12T20:29:00.001-07:00

driving over the Golden Gate Bridge yesterday

I've been too overwhelmed by this "moving to California" thing to even catch up on my politics, but I will say that, as Princess SparklePony's latest posts prove, there is no longer any such thing as sensible discourse or political debate in this country. If I hear one more goddamned word about "death panels" or "Palin plots divorce" or "freak takes gun to Obama healthcare town meeting and can't fucking figure out why the cops went nuts on his ass," I'm just going to tune out all together.

Come to my other blog and look at some pretty pictures. We just spent two days in San Francisco, and boy howdy--it was nice to see so many different characters and assorted kooks in one place. Toto, we're not in Central PA anymore.

Cross-postin' fer jesus**

2009-07-21T08:58:00.000-07:00

Check out the latest California news at my other other blog.

**- I know the title makes no sense. It just sounded funny.

What scares me today

2009-07-21T06:27:00.001-07:00

1. Google Voice. I heard about this yesterday, where you can get one phone number (assigned to you by Google) and route all your other phone numbers (cell, home, work, etc.) to that one Google number. Does anyone else think such a plan will make it just that much easier for the government (or anyone, for that matter) to monitor ALL our communications?

2. That the Right-Wing Media actually thinks Michael Steele can substantively and effectively "rip" anything, other than maybe a big fart. For the more realistic version of events, see Princess Sparkle Pony's report on the situation.

One giant leap

2009-07-16T07:47:00.000-07:00

"Earthrise," taken July 20, 1969, from the Apollo 11 Command Module

Forty years ago today, Apollo 11 left Earth and began its journey to the moon. As a kid, I remember lying on the tile floor of our living room, sick as a dog from Montezuma's revenge after our yearly summer trip to my mother's mother's home in San Luis Potosi, Mexico. The floor was cool, and my mom had placed a box fan on the floor to blow air on me. I had a fever and was throwing up everything I ate, but there was no way I was gonna miss that moon shot.

The biggest thing I took away from the Apollo moon landings, especially that first one, was the idea that we could do incredible things if we put our minds to it. The dreams of my generation involved the dreams of the entire planet, rapt with attention, watching that rocket take off and then, awestruck, watching Neil and Buzz walk on the moon. The entire planet! How many times has the entire planet watched the same thing and been so affected, so united? Sure, the Olympics often captivate the world--but those athletes, while they're doing things no regular person could do, aren't braving space and landing on the moon. And countries remain insular during the Olympics, with each nation's people rooting only for their own men and women.

Apollo and the moon landing united all people as one nation--we were all earthlings, not Americans or Russians or Germans or Australians.

Noble people and noble causes, inspiring us all. Do we have anything like that now? When the world comes together, what do they watch? What brings them together? American Idol? Some YouTube video? A sporting event? Perhaps the closest thing is the first few days after 9/11, but we had to experience such tragedy to know that kind of global closeness.

I feel sorry for those who didn't get to experience the moon landing, as well as the other moon missions, first-hand. I think kids today are incapable of imagining a world united for one purpose. They're incapable of imagining that we, puny humans that we are, can accomplish something so huge and so important and so difficult. Kids today are used to daily but somewhat meaningless and empty accomplishments -- cellphones that can take pictures and videos, or iPhones that can wipe your ass for you, or computers so fast you don't even have to wait more than a second for anything to open. Technological progress has become commonplace to them; they're impressed by the latest video game only for as long as it takes them to find another gadget to be impressed by.

The moon landings, on the other hand, impressed a generation of us in a way that is truly lasting. I will always feel that surge of joy and pride and accomplishment, as well as the resulting desire to know more: more about us, more about our universe, more about what we can do. When I see anything related to space, that feeling comes back to me just as strongly as it did back then, as I lay there on the floor, feeling sweaty and feverish but more excited and awe-struck than I had ever been or would ever be in my life. My life, all our lives, were changed forever.

I can't even listen to NPR anymore

2009-07-15T06:52:00.000-07:00

In yet another instance of stupidity and bias, NPR pissed me off again (daily occurrence!) this morning.

At 8:30am (Eastern), some guy (can't remember the reporter's name) reported on the Sotomayor hearing yesterday, and he comes right out swinging the idiot-bat:

"So far, she's remained unflappable."

He could've said, "she's remained composed in the face of fucking ridiculous questions about nun-chucks and the like." But no -- he says she's remained unflappable, as if that's some kind of surprise. I guess we should all be surprised when a 'Rican doesn't pull a knife or start shouting obscenities in Spanish. You know how hot-blooded and volatile all we hispanics are.

Then he goes on to say, in his "she's doing well so far!" piece, that she "sounded like a Bush nominee" when she said that judges should be "strict interpreters of the Constitution."

Since when does a judge who declares this to be his/her philosophy automatically sound like a Bush nominee instead of just a judge who's doing his/her job? I guess since the Rovian machine started using that bullshit phrase along with the equally bullshit "activist judges."

Isn't every judge an interpreter of the Constitution, "strict" or otherwise? I mean, either you use the Constitution as your basis or you don't. And if you don't, you don't gain the kind of sterling record that Sotomayor has. And we all know that unless you're a "strict interpreter," you're pretty much an activist judge, and you're going to force women to have abortions while burning a flag and writing a check out to Osama bin Laden (remember him?). Oh, and you hate freedom and America.

I had to change the station at that point.

You know, in a small town like State College, there isn't really much variety on the radio. We have classic rock, oldies, that hip-hop/dance/top-40 crap, and that's about it. I try to remember the old days when NPR was actually a good news source, and I tune to 91.5 FM, and every freakin' day they disappoint.

I'll conclude by encouraging you to check out NPR Check (see my sidebar for the link). There's always an open thread, so you too can talk about the latest stupidity you've heard on NPR. I mentioned the topic of this post in a comment on the latest thread, but I was so angry that I had to post about it.

"If the president does it, it's not illegal"

2009-07-14T07:14:00.000-07:00

This morning on NPR, I heard Steve Innskeep interviewing a man from Iran about the many people who've been taken prisoner by the Iranian government since the election. The interviewee named several people, most of them friends of his (I'm sorry, but I was driving and couldn't write the names down--and they won't post today's stories online until later today--I'll link then).

The notable part of the interview, at least to me, occurred when the interviewee revealed that at least one of these prisoners is now reportedly being tortured. He said that "last time," two years ago, the Republican Guard would arrest people but they would just hold them. This time, "it's different," he said--he's heard that at least one prisoner he knows is being beaten and tortured.

"What's changed between last time and this time?" Steve Innskeep didn't ask.

"Last time," the interviewee didn't reply, "the Iranian government and the Republican Guard didn't have as justification the fact that the US tortures all the time. Now they know the US tortures, so why can't the Iranians?"

Innskeep then didn't say, "Oh, of course--if the most powerful and supposedly upright and law-abiding nation in the world can torture prisoners on a regular basis, then other nations whose governments might've been afraid to anger the UN and defy international laws before can now torture just like the US, with impunity."

"Exactly," the interviewee didn't conclude.

Let the boycott of the right-wing media begin!

2009-07-13T07:56:00.000-07:00

Crest Whitestrips ...... Delphi ...... Mercedes Benz ...... Comcast
Subaru ...... GMC Suv's ...... Best Buy ...... Travelocity
Capzasin ...... New Phase ...... Orbitz ...... Ditech.com
eloan.com ...... Dawn ...... Toyota ...... Centrum
Nextel ...... Vehix.com ...... Gold Bond ...... Aspercreme
webmd.com ...... American Express ...... Holiday Inn Express
M Professional ...... priceline.com

All these products/companies are ad sponsors of Faux Nooz. Please join me in boycotting them. This list will remain up top as a reminder. And every chance you get to mention the media, call them the "right-wing media." The "liberal media" is simply a lie.

Compare and contrast

2009-07-13T07:20:00.001-07:00

This morning, there are two items of note I'd like us to examine.

The first: The number of American children in poverty is going up. Again.

18 percent of all children 17 and under were living in poverty in 2007 -- up from 17 percent in 2006. The percentage of children who had at least one parent working full time was 77 percent in 2007 -- down from 78 percent in 2006. And those living in households with extremely low "food security" -- where parents described children as being hungry or having skipped a meal or gone without eating for an entire day -- increased from 0.6 percent in 2006 to 0.9 percent in 2007, the report said. my emphasis]

Yup, this certainly is the land of plenty, the richest country in the world. It disgusts me that while this goes on, banks and Wall Street billionaires are still crying and bitching for more government bailout money. Our government's priorities have gone completely to hell, all with the help of both repuglicans and democrats. We have a shitty education system, hungry children, and people out of work. Colleges turning away students. But AIG's lining up some more bonuses for their thieving execs.

This goatfuck of a situation leads me to provide the following for contrast:

Dick Cheney's net worth "estimated to be between $30 million and $100 million, is largely derived from his post as CEO of Halliburton from 1995 till 2000." Amazing how someone can work for a company for only five years, yet make between 30 and 100 MILLION dollars doing it. All this for a man who, it's finally being revealed, withheld information from Congress regarding the CIA's torture tactics and other "counterterrorism" efforts.

Maybe NOW there will be some accounting for the war crimes of the Bush Administration. Maybe NOW, after they've seemingly gotten away with it all, Chimpy and Darth Cheney will finally stop their smirking and their hiding.

I won't hold my breath.

Like shooting fish in a barrel

2009-07-07T08:12:00.001-07:00

"Summertime, and the livin' is easy.
Fish are jumpin', and the cotton is high."

--George Gershwin

It's too damned easy to make fun of the repugs these days. It's like the shit writes itself. The Sanfords, the Palins, and the other various assorted freaks and bigmouths on the right just seem to spend their time handing out the loaded guns, putting on their blindfolds, and shouting, "Fire!" all the time. It's hilarious.

I guess that's why I haven't posted much. I am still reading a lot of your blogs, though, and you're all doing some great work.

Meanwhile, I'm steadily paring down my possessions and packing the necessities for the big move. Time is moving faster now, thank goodness, and I just can't wait to leave this burg. I'll miss my girlfriend more than I can say, but I'll be happy to see this place in my rearview mirror.

Enjoy your summer--weather here is fantastic, for a change. Sunshine and cool breezes, as opposed to the usual rain.

War update -- still going!

2009-07-02T06:58:00.001-07:00

Even as we're pulling out of one debacle, we're ratcheting up in another.

This latest Afghanistan operation is getting as much press as Michael Jackson's death. It makes me think that if the Normandy invasion were happening tomorrow, our guys would get blown out of the water before they even landed because the Nazis would've heard all about the coming invasion on NPR.

Happy Canada Day!

2009-07-01T05:56:00.001-07:00

For all you Canucks out there, here are few things you can use for your Canada Day celebrations:

mail a letter with this stamp:

watch out for this guy:

have a few of these:

do whatever it is you do with those maple leaves:

drive a red Barchetta in the limelight with Tom Sawyer and this guy:

don't get lost in Quebec:

fly with these guys:

and take off, hoser!

R.I.P, Michael Jackson--Questions edition

2009-06-26T06:32:00.000-07:00

How does this happen?

How does one make millions over a career, but still be $400 million in debt?

What was your favorite Michael song, either with the Jackson 5 or solo?

Do you think his cause of death will be ruled as "natural causes" or one of those "accidental overdoses" that seems to happen so often with celebs?

Infidelity vs. criminality

2009-06-25T06:16:00.000-07:00

So yet another repug has been outed as a mere human being with sex on his mind.

Seems a lot of these "family values" spouters sure do like to screw around, either with the ladies or the pages in their office or whatever.

But I couldn't help but think, as I listened to Sanford's press confo cuts on NPR yesterday afternoon, that I really didn't give a shit about his apologies or his tears or his sexy funtimes with Maria in Argentina. I didn't even give a shit that he lied about his whereabouts and told people he was hiking. Let's face it: Cheaters ALWAYS lie about it; if you were a cheater, you'd lie too. It's human nature to want to stay out of trouble. Like when I was a kid, and I blamed everything on my big brother. Sometimes my guilt over having taken apart Mommy's alarm clock, or having left the iron on the arm of the couch and burned a big brown iron-shape into the upholstery, or going to the video arcade instead of going to mass--well, my guilt was so strong that sometimes that all Mommy had to say was "Delia?" before I'd spit out a lie: "I didn't do it! Maybe it was Ricardo!" It was like a knee-jerk reflex, impossible for my little guilty mind to control.

But this stuff? This affair crap? Just like I didn't give a shit about Bill and his sexy cigartimes with Monica Lewinsky, I don't give a shit about Mr Perfect and his Argentina mistress.

Oh, it's hilarious enough to hear about another picture-perfect repug proving that he's just another slimeball cheating on his wife; I mean, that's always good comedy. But did I want to listen to him apologizing to all the people he'd "failed" and "disappointed" and all that? Did I want to hear about his crying back in Argentina and his crying here? Do I want to hear all the blowhards on TV crying about how betrayed they feel?

Nope.

It all just seemed maudlin and forced. It was a big drama show, staged for the media, just because he's a political figure. If he weren't the governor, no one outside his family and maybe his church community would care about whether he was hiking a trail or lying and cheating. I don't care to hear Fat-Tush Limpdick or anyone pontificate on this guy's lack of moral fiber, betrayal of the people, blah blah blah.

What I DO care about is this: this is the same guy who's been a poster boy for the "family values" reich-wing wacko contingent. Back in the 1990s, he was calling for Clinton's resignation after the Lewinsky crap. He's been playing Mr. Family Man with his perfect little white family, posing for all the photos and positioning himself as a presidential contender. If it weren't for this hypocrisy, I would give him a pass, just like I gave Bill. Anyone can make a mistake.

But Mr. Perfect is, in actuality, Mr. Thieving Scumbag. Using state funds to get to Argentina for his sexy fun time--THAT I care about.

And for THAT, and that alone, the guy should resign. And he should go to jail. That's theft, asshole. There's no criminal charge for fucking another woman besides your wife, so I don't care about that--but there sure is a law for using the state's money to do it.

Some new ways to deny global warming

2009-06-17T07:34:00.001-07:00

More of that pesky "truth" crap was released about how badly we're fucking up the planet with our CO2 and pollution. To this I say, "Truth, Schmuth!" Here are some handy ways to continue to deny this whole "reality" trip:

1. Mother Earth is going through menopause; hence, the hot flashes.

2. Did anyone ever think that the sun, NOT the earth, just might be getting hotter?

3. Science is for geeks and pussies.

You can thank me later, from your oceanside home in Kansas.

If you haven't seen this site...

2009-06-12T07:43:00.000-07:00

...you should.

What my text would say:
Is there anyone in the world who doesn't know what "the coffee just kicked in" means?

Yay, a non-political post!

2009-06-11T13:51:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I just have to completely tune out the politics and the news and the idiocy. That's when I do a movie post.

About a million years ago, Dr. Monkey did a list of what he considered to be the best movies made each year since he’d been born. It was a great list, and I decided (and commented) that I would do a similar post for myself. And hey! It’s only taken me a whole freakin’ year to compile the list!

Here are my favorite movies, by year, for every year since the year I was born. Just to bore you to death, I've added the other movies made that year that were also good ones in my opinion.

Oh and one more thing -- I didn't italicize any of the titles because I'm too lazy. Fuck the italics! Anarchy! Anarchy!

Ahem.

Sorry. Here's the list:

1964: My Fair Lady – I didn’t know until a few years ago that the role of Eliza had been originated on Broadway by Julie Andrews, whom I love love love. I knew Audrey Hepburn wasn’t singing right from the beginning, though. I still love this movie, however, especially when Mrs. Higgins chastises her son Henry and Colonel Pickering for being “a pretty pair of babies playing with your live doll.” Excellent. Finalists: Ensign Pulver, Father Goose, Goldfinger, Fistful of Dollars, The Three Lives of Thomasina -- all childhood favorites.

1965: This one was easy – Dr. Zhivago, hands down. Sorry to The Sound of Music and Julie Andrews. (Love you!)

1966: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly – I loves me some Clint Eastwood, and this is a great one. “Hey Blondie! Hey Blondie!” Finalists: The Blue Max, Batman, A Man Called Flintstone, Munster Go Home!, What’s Up Tiger Lily?

1967: To Sir, With Love – a sentimental favorite, and I had a little-girl crush on the girl that played Pamela (the one with the crush on Sir). Finalists: In the Heat of the Night, Cool Hand Luke, Valley of the Dolls (hilariously bad)

1968: Funny Girl – an amazing musical and acting performance for a very young Barbra. Finalists: The Odd Couple (remember how Jack Lemmon’s Felix did the allergy-throat “haaa! haaa!”? Priceless.)

1969: True Grit. I didn’t see Butch Cassidy, so that one didn’t win. Plus hearing “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on My Head” always makes me carsick.

1970: Little Big Man – “Come and lay on my soft furs!” I really liked MASH too, but Little Big Man is still one of my favorite movies to watch on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

1971: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory – still one of my favorite movies and books. Just plain hilarious and well done. Finalists: Dirty Harry, Fiddler on the Roof (especially the bottle dance at the wedding and the Grandma dream sequence), and Man in the Wilderness. I didn’t see the universally recognized greats of this year, The French Connection and A Clockwork Orange.

1972: The Godfather – I’d never seen a movie like this one. Amazingly violent, moving, and terrifying. Finalists: Deliverance (talk about terrifying), Jeremiah Johnson (still a fave), What’s Up, Doc? (pure greatness).

1973: The Sting – This was the toughest year for me. I loved Paper Moon, High Plains Drifter, Badlands, Serpico, and Papillon, but The Sting had such great music.

1974: Where the Lilies Bloom – if you’ve never seen/heard of this one, GET IT. Finalists: The Godfather Part 2, Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore (“shit-kicking, shit-kicking, shit-kicking!”), Animals Are Beautiful People (a documentary), Young Frankenstein, Uptown Saturday Night.

1975: Jaws – an easy one, and yes—I’m still afraid to swim at the beach. But there were other greats that year: Barry Lyndon (some people find it boring, but I love it), Funny Lady, Love and Death (a GREAT Woody Allen movie), Monty Python and the Holy Grail (pure gold). I never saw all of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest or The Sunshine Boys, but I’m sure they’re great.

1976: Rocky – yo Adrian! Finalists: The Bad News Bears (sweet), Bugsy Malone,d Futureworld (scared the pee out of a young me), Midway, Murder by Death (a classic!), The Omen (see above re: pee).

1977: Star Wars – how could anyone anywhere in America disagree? This movie made me want to be Luke Skywalker, complete with utility belt and hot Princess Leia to kiss. Finalists: High Anxiety, Close Encounters of the Third Kind

1978: Alien – holy moly, was I terrified. Finalists: The Inlaws (“Serpentine, Sheldon, serpentine!”), Escape from Alcatraz, Heaven Can Wait, Kramer vs. Kramer, Breaking Away, My Brilliant Career, Superman, Being There. Many would pick Apocalypse Now but I’ve never seen it.

1979: Norma Rae – still an amazing performance by Sally Field. I also liked North Dallas Forty and Nosferatu the Vampyre (with an incredibly creepy Klaus Kinski).

1980: The Empire Strikes Back – what a sequel. Other faves: Gloria (“I’m the man! I’M the man!” and Gena Rowlands), The Gods Must Be Crazy, Nine to Five, Superman II, Flash Gordon (hilariously bad), and Private Benjamin (“I wanna wear my sandals! I wanna have lunch!”)

1981: Raiders of the Lost Ark – a great adventure movie. Of course, Excalibur was wonderful, as were Chariots of Fire, Mommie Dearest, and the classic Zorro the Gay Blade.

1982: Bladerunner – by now, my Harrison Ford love knew no bounds. I still had no clue about the whole “lesbian” thing. Tron was also a big fave, as I was a complete geek at this point in my life. I never got what was sooooo great about Fast Times at Ridgemont High, though I liked it. Night Shift was funny, until I realized how incredibly sexist-piggish it was.

1983: The Big Chill – this was my senior year in high school and an amazing year for movies. I could’ve picked any of these: Cross Creek, Flashdance, Entre Nous, Educating Rita, Trading Places, Mr. Mom, Yentl, Scarface, Valley Girl, The Year of Living Dangerously – all greats in my book, for various reasons.

1984: The Terminator – a true classic. I love how wimpy Linda Hamilton looks in this one, especially compared to the powerhouse hottie she’d become in the second movie. “I’m at the Tech Noir!” Finalists: Romancing the Stone, Amadeus, American Dreamer, Karate Kid (hee hee!), Dune, Purple Rain (one of the worst-acted movies ever, in every single role! That takes skill!), Sixteen Candles, A Passage to India, Beverly Hills Cop (one of my mom’s favorite movies).

1985: Murphy’s Romance – you’re probably saying, “huh?” This movie featured wonderfully understated and underrated performances by Sally Field and James Garner. Other good ones: Back to the Future, Fandango, Real Genius, Out of Africa, Witness, Mask, The Breakfast Club

1986: Aliens – again, a sequel that topped the original (just like with Empire Strikes Back, Terminator 2, Godfather II, and Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers). This movie was scarier and better than the original, with Sigourney Weaver really developing her uber-mother-badass-ness. Finalists: Hannah and Her Sisters (quite possibly Woody’s last funny movie), Heartbreak Ridge (underrated!), Ruthless People.

1987: Moonstruck – this movie gets better every time I see it. So many great lines and scenes! Finalists: The Princess Bride, Wall Street, Baby Boom

1988: Scrooged – Bill Murray at his best, up to that point. He would only get better later. Other great movies: Stand and Deliver, Dangerous Liaisons, Rainman.

1989: When Harry Met Sally – I used to call this my favorite movie. Now I don’t, but only because the Lord of the Rings trilogy just pretty much knocked everything else out. Finalists: Field of Dreams, Batman, The Little Mermaid (shut up! I like it!), Dead Calm, Roger and Me, Chances Are (shut up again! I love Cybill Sheppard!), Miss Firecracker (“Swoop! Swoop!”)

1990: Goodfellas – this movie got everything right. Finalists: Dances with Wolves, Dick Tracy, Pretty Woman (horrible but I still like it), Misery, Tremors (hilarious).

1991: The Silence of the Lambs – followed closely by Terminator 2. It was almost a tie, but Jody Foster’s hot. Other faves: The Commitments, JFK, Backdraft, New Jack City, Thelma and Louise (painful to watch), LA Story.

1992: Unforgiven – Clint, still making movie gold. Finalists: The Bodyguard (I just liked the music, okay?), A League of Their Own, Malcolm X, The Crying Game, Reservoir Dogs (amazing), White Men Can’t Jump (just funny escapism), Far and Away (Nicole Kidman at her hottest).

1993: Tombstone – Val Kilmer made this one with his portrayal of Doc Holliday. I never get tired of watching it. Finalists: Groundhog Day (another Murray classic), The Pelican Brief (I liked Julia Roberts back then), Sleepless in Seattle (I’m a sap, okay?), Jurassic Park (just for the dinos), Schindler’s List, Dave.

1994: The Shawshank Redemption. Did any other movies even get made this year? Who cares – this movie is pure greatness.

1995: Babe – this movie still makes me cry. Other favorites were The American President (I wish we could have a president like him!), Apollo 13.

1996: Fargo – easy. I also loved Long Kiss Goodnight with Geena Davis playing the tallest action heroine ever.

1997: Jackie Brown – pure perfection. Finalists: As Good as it Gets, Good Will Hunting, Contact (Jody = hawt), Donnie Brasco.

1998: Life Is Beautiful – a sweet sweet film. I also loved Rush Hour, Deep Impact (the OTHER asteroid movie, with a smokin’ hawt Tia Leoni), X-Files: Fight the Future (Scully = hawt). Notice how the pickin’s are getting slim? They just didn’t make many great movies in the late 90s, in my opinion. At least not that I saw.

1999: The Talented Mr. Ripley – Matt Damon’s best performance. Other big faves: Fight Club, The Sixth Sense, The Matrix (only because of the filming techniques, not Keanu’s “acting”).

2000: Cast Away – man, this movie makes me sad. I also liked Erin Brockovich and Unbreakable. Couldn’t find another movie made this year that I liked. Wow.

2001: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – is that tiny little Harry just the cutest little thing you’ve ever seen? Yes he is.

2002: Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers – my favorite of the Ring trilogy, although Theodin makes me yell at the TV because he’s such a freakin’ wimp. The first Bourne movie, The Bourne Identity, was also great.

2003: Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring – here’s how that conversation on the lava-covered mountainside of Mt Doom would’ve gone had it been me instead of Samwise with Frodo:
Frodo: “I’m glad you’re with me, Sam, here at the end of all things.”
Me: “Don’t worry, Frodo. I’m not gonna tell everyone about how you went all evil and tried to keep the ring. I won’t tell everyone how Gollum had to bite your freakin’ finger off just to get the ring. Just sayin’.”
This was a tough year, finally, after so many crappy years. Other finalists: Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (Keira Knightley = hawt), Bad Santa (effing hilarious), Calendar Girls, Finding Nemo, Kill Bill Vol 1, Lost in Translation, Monster, Under the Tuscan Sun (Diane Lane = hawt).

2004: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban – probably my favorite Harry Potter movie to date, but another tough call with Kill Bill Vol 2, Fahrenheit 9/11, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and The Bourne Supremacy making it a great year.

2005: Pride and Prejudice – I love the book, I love the movie, I love Keira Knightley. Finalists: HP and the Goblet of Fire; The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe; Crash; Capote; Transamerica; The Constant Gardener; Batman Begins; Good Night, and Good Luck; Syriana. Finally, Hollywood (and indie films) started getting it right again.

2006: Little Miss Sunshine – if you haven’t seen this one, please do so. Every single actor in this film was amazing. Other good ones: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest, V for Vendetta, Inside Man, The Devil Wears Prada, Eight Below (shut up! It was sad and uplifting!), The Queen, The Good Shepherd.

2007: No Country for Old Men – easy call. Still, some good stuff this year too: Breach, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (I don’t know why I loved these movies; I just did!--probably just Keira), American Gangster, Zodiac, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (great casting, terrible adaption), Atonement (so sad!), The Bourne Ultimatum.

2008: The Dark Knight – not that great a year for movies, in my opinion. I mean, what are you gonna pick – Baby Mama? Sure it was funny, but do you remember anything besides the general hilariousness? Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull –holy crap, Harrison – give it up. You look like a corpse. Do you need money that badly? Just say no! Burn After Reading was okay, with a hilariously goofy performance by Brad Pitt of all people, but it wasn’t the Coen’s best work.

2009: I don’t even think I’ve seen a new movie this year. I’m waiting on the edge of my seat for the sixth Harry Potter movie, which I just KNOW is going to be effing GREATNESS.

I need to lie down... bring me some smelling salts.

2009-06-11T06:58:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, I just start smiling, thinking about how grateful I am that we managed to elect Barack Obama instead of the old geezer and the Alaskan freakshow. I think, "Boy, Americans aren't so crazy and dumb after all!"

Then I wake up.

You wanna see some crazy? You wanna see some dumb? Just check out these Princess Sparkle Pony posts, featuring the unedited comments of everyday Americans. By the time you're done, I guarantee you'll feel like you've just gone 15 rounds with an in-his-prime Muhammad Ali.

Sarah Palin's toenails
White Supremacist killer in the Holocaust Museum
More on the Holocaust Museum killer

To think these people work, vote, operate heavy machinery, walk among us, etc. It's truly frightening.

Uh oh...

2009-06-09T13:03:00.001-07:00

If Princess Sparkle Pony is right about "frowny sucked-in-lips face" being a bad sign, or as the Princess says, "associated with guilt, embarrassment, acknowledgment of stupidity, etc."--I think Obama's in trouble. This is what the front page at Talking Points Memo looks like:
Oy vey.

Cleansing duck post

2009-06-04T09:29:00.001-07:00

Surrounded by activity, I am all still.

Some more thoughts and reactions--UPDATED

2009-06-03T07:21:00.000-07:00

President Obama has declared June "Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month." Pretty cool, eh? I can't imagine any other president doing this--even Bill Clinton wimped out all the time when it came to teh gay, so I'm glad Obama has recognized that he won't burst into flames if he says "gay" or "lesbian." That moment during his inaugural address when he said those words--that still gives me chills when I think about it.

You can read the full text of his proclamation here. I like this line: "I call upon the people of the United States to turn back discrimination and prejudice everywhere it exists."

Are Americans ready "to turn back discrimination and prejudice everywhere it exists" yet? Are we even ABLE to do this? Every time I think we're making progress, a Prop 8 or a "Sotomayor's a racist!" or something like that will happen, and I realize we're sooooooo far from embodying the vision of Dr. King when he talked about people being judged by the content of their character. And that makes me sad.

I think that maybe if more of us started turning this whole racial discussion around--talking about it whenever ANYONE is nominated for something, the way I did in this post from the other day--then MAYBE people will see how stupid the whole idea is. Imagine reading something like this:

Roberts nomination: Is it about ethnicity?
John Roberts could be the latest white man to serve on the Supreme Court. And as we learn more about him, the more questions centered on his ethnic background abound. Was he chosen partly because of his white origins? Does he consider race in his rulings? Are we focusing too much on his ethnicity and not enough on his judicial history?

Check out the original post for an explanation. I'd like your take on it. I think it kinda got buried by Iron Chef talk, though, so if you haven't read it, please do and comment either here or there.

- - - - -

If you don't listen to NPR (I listen for as long as I can stand it, then I always hear something that makes me hit another station's button), you haven't been listening to the amazingly stupid discussion about the Sotomayor nomination to the SCOTUS, and that one quote wherein she actually TOOK PRIDE in being a "wise Latina." God forbid! The nerve!

I read a great guest-post on Echidne's blog; the only way I can figure out how to link to it is to link to all the posts from that day (May 31, my mommy's birthday!). It's the second post down. A great great post, that one--all about the idiocy of isolating one sentence and pinning everything on it -- then turning that tactic around on the idiots who are doing it to try to derail Sotomayor's nomination.

Speaking of NPR, my GOD -- it gets worse every day. Be sure to check out NPR Check, linked in my sidebar, if you want to read about how bad it's gotten.

- - - - -

Just saw a link to a completely amazing story that is not getting adequate coverage in the MSM: actual clergy--baptists, even!--saying that they support equal marriage rights! h/t to Sue J for the link and for bringing the story to my attention. And no thanks to the many stupid media outlets that are ignoring/underreporting the story.

Gay marriage, as I've said before, isn't really my issue, but I abhor the idea of denying people the right to marry whomever they please. Discrimination is just wrong. So anyway, I was having a deep discussion this morning with my girlfriend, and the subject of living together came up -- as in, sometime in the future. We began to talk about my fears, based on past relationships, about how things just always seem to END, no matter how great things start out. It's disheartening, and it's enough to make me have said on many occasions that I'll never live with anyone again.

That said, I began to wonder whether marriage really would make a difference. Maybe the legally binding aspect of it would help when things get tough. Of course, straights are topping the 50% mark on divorces, but still--does marriage make a difference to two people who've vowed to stay together? You married folks out there--does it?

- - - - -

On a brighter note, we have baby ducks in our courtyard, and I don't mean the ducks that PoP regularly invokes. They're so cute and fuzzy, and their little markings are so striking. I'll try to get a photo, to cleanse our mental palates from all the shite that regularly flows in the political realm. We also have baby robins. I love spring!

My thoughts on the Tiller murder

2009-06-01T10:46:00.000-07:00

Imagine you were sitting someplace in public, just having a lemonade in the park or listening to the preacher in church, when someone came up to you and killed you. For doing your job.

Dr. George Tiller was killed because he did his job--providing a particular medical service to women -- a perfectly legal medical service, I might add.

Some video from Iron Chef: MEXICAN!

2009-06-01T06:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I might as well tell you the results: Matty edged out Anne Marie once again. It was pretty heart-breaking to watch, but that's how it went down. Matty was very gracious in victory, and AM was gracious in defeat -- and a good time was had by all.

NOTE: I realized that I downloaded all my event video from the presentation of the main dishes on through judging and the post-competition interviews onto Matty's laptop and deleted it from my camera... then couldn't copy it all back to upload here! (It was taking like a half hour to upload at Matty's.) So this video will be from the middle of the competition, and I'll have the closing interviews tomorrow most likely. They are compelling--"the thrill of victory, and the agony of defeat!"

Both AM and Matty discussed their approach to the Mexican food theme:

And some things were better left un-"discussed" (I'm talkin' to you, Nommy).

More video tomorrow, I hope.

New guests, and some informational clarity

2009-05-31T15:54:00.000-07:00

We had an internets snafu, but we're back online--but the contest is over! Still, I'll keep the outcome a secret until the end of this post. Get ready for some serious video. By the way, live-blogging is a pain if you're doing photos or video, folks. I'm gonna load a few pics now, and I'll do the majority of the video tomorrow.

More arrivals--from left to right--Mikey, Brooke, and Joe, of local band Surgical Staff:

Here are a few stills from the big action:

Appetizers:
It was complete chaos the entire night, with over fifteen people in two small rooms. The food was good, but the competition was fierce!

I'll post video and stuff tomorrow--for now, it's after ten, I've had a margarita or two, and the competition wore me out!

And so it begins--Iron Chef: Mexican!

2009-05-31T15:06:00.001-07:00

Here's the first meeting of our chefs.

They shook hands, and then the trash-talking began:

Afterwards, everyone got here. Here's who's here:

Jazzy Jeff.

DJ Dorothy, the Disco Ultimatum.

Cinnamon Girl.

Domino, the official dog of Beginningtobird, my other bloggy.

and of course, Baby G and her friend Julie.

Stay tuned! The next update will be around 7, when the cooking begins!

FINAL! Iron Chef: MEXICAN!

2009-05-29T11:20:00.001-07:00

Here's what happens when you get two self-described "foodie divas" doing something they call "brainstorming" -- which I call "being effing indecisive and making Delia crazy."

The email chain, after the "summer night" thing:

FOODIE DIVA #1:
how bout just something free form? iron chef "summer
night" we prepare an app, main course, and drink of our choice?

FOODIE DIVA #2:
hmm... delia, weigh in. the theme binds us together and
makes for heightened competition, i think. but this is a nice idea.

GUZMAN:
Both compelling arguments. However, I believe the theme makes
for a more level playing field. The judges are comparing apples to apples, or
fish to fish, or whatever the case may be.
On the other hand, an open-ended
"summer night" category allows each chef to fully unleash her/his creativity in
every aspect of the meal!
As such -- if you are both in agreement that such
a contest will provide for both a fair and compelling (we have our audience to
consider, after all!) competition, then I say YES.
If you agree to Iron Chef: SUMMER NIGHT -- please indicate. If not, come up with an alternative.

Despite my pretending to act like I cared about their opinion, I figured it was a done deal at this point. But I was wrong.

FD#1:
some more ideas:
iron chef appetizer: one hour to create 3 or 4
appetizers
iron chef mango: appetizer and dessert using the
ingredient
iron chef: burger. any kind, any style.

GUZMAN:
Now DECIDE on something already, Dr. ADD!

FD#2:
patience, delia!!!
i'll keep thinking/brainstorming. no rush! i like
appetizers and the burger idea, but dont want to exclude vegetarians.
pasta?

GUZMAN:
But I've already updated the blog post!
http://impeachmentandotherdreams.blogspot.com/2009/05/iron-chef.html
DAMMIT!

FD#1:
haha suck it up D. I had already created a facebook event for iron chef
mexican.
Foodie divas must be given creativity time:)
How bout this!
Iron chef burger. We have veggie burgers available
(morningstar grillers are very good) as well, but with the same toppings. We can
be graded on
--style (the type of burger - bbq, california,
etc)
--flavour
--presentation
or...we could be required to make two
burgers in the hour. One must be vegetarian.
same deal with the appetizers.
4 appetizers in an hour. 2 must be vegetarian.
I'm liking the
brainstorming!:)

Sweet jaysus. Watch Sunday and see what happens when I drink and emcee at the same time.

Okay, now I'm pissed.

2009-05-29T09:55:00.000-07:00

You know my feelings about this whole SCOTUS/'happy hispanics' crap. I just read this completely insane article on the CNN website, and that was it. I couldn't help but write my own version for your consideration and comment.

NOTES:
Methodology: I've excerpted several passages from the original article; where I cut material, I've indicated with the word "--SNIP--". I've changed all instances of "Sotomayor" to "Roberts," "hispanic/Latina" to "white man," "he/him/his" to "she/her/hers," "Obama" to "Bush," "republicans" to "democrats," etc. To be sure that all changes are clear, I've bolded and changed the color of all the things I changed. No other changes have been made.

Desired result: Tell me in the comments whether such an article would EVER appear ANYWHERE but one of our blogs. Feel free to comment on any other aspect of this issue or this post.

Now -- the rest of this post is quoted directly (albeit as excerpts and the bolded modifications specified above) from the CNN article.

Roberts nomination: Is it about ethnicity?
John Roberts could be the latest white man to serve on the Supreme Court. And as we learn more about him, the more questions centered on his ethnic background abound. Was he chosen partly because of his white origins? Does he consider race in his rulings? Are we focusing too much on his ethnicity and not enough on his judicial history?
Roberts is, to say the least, a provocative pick on President Bush's part. Here are four of the questions commentators are asking -- and your answers.
What role did ethnicity play in Roberts' nomination?
Did Bush choose John Roberts partly because he’s a white man? Katy Brown thinks so.
"It's just another gimmick," said Brown, a college student from Charleston, West Virginia. "Just another opportunity to make something out of nothing: yet another white man [on the court]. ... Race is being played once again. So my question is, did he actually look at Roberts’ background; did he pick him because of the right reasons? Or did he just want to make another statement in America and base his decision on race?"
--SNIP--

What role will ethnicity play in his confirmation?
"I think it's important that we're making sure he is being judged on his record and not the other 'R' word: his race," said Omekongo Dibinga of Washington.
Dibinga is concerned that senators -- who must confirm Roberts before he can take the seat -- and the public will assume that Roberts' ethnic background will unfairly influence his decisions. "Let's not make him the immigration Supreme Court justice; let's not make him the next male Supreme Court justice," he said. "If we really want to talk about how he interprets the law even-handedly, then we should make sure that we are processing his nomination even-handedly."
Robert Stewart has a different perspective. He thinks Senate Republicans will hesitate to criticize Roberts for fear of being accused of racism or sexism, and he called Bush’s pick of Roberts "brilliant," partially because of the ethnicity and gender factors.
"Anyone who brings up either sex or race will set themselves up for being labeled sexist or racist, tarnishing their reputation," he wrote. "While sex/race/religion should not make a difference, we would be ignorant to not understand how this can be used by both sides, and with the Democrats in the minority in the Senate, this will certainly be brought up to discredit their opposition to Roberts.
"While it is often repeated and emphasized that his nomination is not based on sex/race, everyone knows that this is a card that will be played," he added.

Does Roberts consider race or ethnicity in his judicial decisions? Should he?
"Why, every time an [ethnic majority] comes into an office or a situation of making decisions for our country, do we get concerned about will they show favoritism?" Richard Gaskin asked. Political pundits and iReporters alike are highly divided on the validity of his question.
--SNIP--
...Joseph Condon of Richmond, Virginia, feels that Roberts "will not be wearing a blindfold when [he] makes rulings." He is concerned that Roberts would put his own beliefs and feelings above the Constitution and that perhaps his cultural background could unfairly influence his decisions. Condon had some strong words to describe his worries.
"If Roberts is confirmed, his personal experiences, conservative beliefs, and loyalty to blood and culture will be the basis for forming his judicial rulings, and not the United States Constitution," he wrote.

Are we focusing too much on his ethnic background rather than his judicial history and qualifications?
--SNIP--
...Gaskin -- who said that every time a white person comes into a position of power, the public unfairly worries about whether he or she will show racial favoritism -- thinks the conversation the country is having about Roberts’ ethnicity is the wrong one to be having.
"We can now have everyone getting equal chances, and I think that's what this should be all about," he said. "No matter what ethnicity you are, now we all have a chance to have equal rights. ... I hope [Roberts’ nomination] inspires people who come from situations of poverty or less hope to now have hope and change their lives."

Updated: IRON CHEF: Summer Night!

2009-05-29T06:57:00.001-07:00

It's happening again: Matty and Anne Marie, my two friends who challenged each other in Iron Chef: Risotto, will be going at it again on Sunday night! In a much-anticipated rematch, Matty and AM will be heating up the kitchen on SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY!
The theme will be, in Matty's words, "free form... iron chef 'summer night'... we prepare an app, main course, and drink of our choice." AM agreed, and so it's on!

As the main dishes will likely be non-vegetarian, I will function once again not as a judge but as emcee of the event, interviewing both the chefs and the judges to bring you an action-packed night of pots, pans, paring, and preparation!

I'll be both live-blogging AND posting video of the intense competition! Those of you who've wondered about how much fun and/or how to do the Iron Chef thing at your home can watch and pick up tips!

I hope you'll join us for what will no doubt prove to be an explosive yet tasty night! Remember: SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY! Around 7pm Eastern time!

Quick hits

2009-05-27T10:00:00.001-07:00

1. All hispanics are thrilled that Sonia Sotomayor, a self-titled "New Yorican," has been nominated to the Supreme Court. Every single one of us has been dreaming of this day since birth. Really. And it's not because she's brilliant or qualified or experienced. We're thrilled because she's hispanic.

2. The funniest part of the Sotomayor nomination is watching Faux Nooz struggling to come up with other news to distract from the fact that they can find NOTHING WRONG with this crazy uppity Mexican lady who thinks she can be on the Supreme Court. They'll gloss over someone of import saying yet again that Sotomayor is a quality person and an excellent choice, and then do yet another live broadcast from some "giant futuristic greenhouse" in California -- because THAT is breaking news, folks.

3. Conservative right-wingers are fucking insane idiots. Seems self-evident to me, but bloggy hero Vikkitikkitavi fuckin' CLOCKS a particular right-winger who claims she used to be a left-winger (but was, in actuality, still a fucking moron, as far as I can tell). BTW, if you're not reading Bells On, you're missing out on some of the best political and social commentary around, bar none.

4. Those spam emails and faxes we all get, supposedly from someone in Nigeria who wants to give us $875,000 if we'll only give him some money up front to get his money out of Nigeria -- these emails and faxes MUST work, because even after all these years, they are STILL being sent around. Someone somewhere must be falling for it.

I have a newflash for you, NPR:

2009-05-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

It is no longer news when Darth Cheney gives a speech.

To call his torture-works jerk-off session this afternoon at some reich-wingnut place "dueling speeches" with President Obama's upcoming Guantanamo-related speech is to assume that what the Dick says is just as important as what the sitting president says.

And that is one stupid, not to mention completely incorrect, assumption.

This morning from about 8:17 to sometime after 9 (Eastern time), NPR repeatedly equated Obama's speech with Cheney's speech. Here's a link to more on their web site: "Also sure to dominate the news are the speeches being delivered this morning by President Barack Obama and former vice president Dick Cheney." At least that's what the web site says -- on air, they didn't use the word "former" even ONCE to describe the Dark Lord.

They also called Cheney's speech "a rebuttal from the Bush Administration." Once again--does ANYONE besides the wingnut population give a shit what Dick or the Bush Administration have to say?

Meet the new boss...

2009-05-13T11:33:00.000-07:00

...same as the old boss?

I used to bristle (okay, I'd scream too) whenever Chimpy and the Dark Lord would use "national security" as justification for whatever lawbreaking, lying, cheating, stealing, etc. that they did during their time in power. Stop torturing? No way, national security would be threatened! Tell the truth about the bogus WMD in Iraq? Hell no, national security depends on keeping everything secret! Reveal that Chimpy's people knew Wall Street was headed for a major-league Krakatoa-level blowout? Fuck no, people--national security relies on keeping this stuff quiet!

Now it seems that Obama has heard that song too, and he's singing it just as loud as Chimpy ever did:

In a reversal, the White House says President Barack Obama is fighting the release of photos showing abuse of prisoners in Iraq and Afghanistan because he believes their release poses a national security threat.

Now tell me: just what "national security" is threatened by the release of photos depicting what EVERYONE already knows our soldiers did, photos that EVERYONE has already seen?

Apparently, Obama made this crap decision "after the top military commanders in Iraq and Afghanistan told the president they feared the release of the photos could endanger their troops." Um, excuse me, military dudes? I think your troops are already pretty much in danger all the damned time. I guess that's what happens when you play War in other people's backyards. They kinda tend to get pretty fucking pissed off when your toy guns turn out to be real.

Some generic White House official claimed that releasing the photos "would only serve the purpose of inflaming the theaters of war, jeopardizing U.S. forces, and making our job more difficult in places like Iraq and Afghanistan." Kinda missed the boat on these things too, don't ya think? How much more of a debacle can we have in Iraq and Afghanistan (not to mention Pakistan)? Our soldiers are already being killed, more every day. The terrists already "hate us for our freedoms," remember? And their strength is growing every damned day, thanks to the constant fuck-up of Chimpy's handling of the war.

It really disappoints me to see Obama playing the same cards and wimping out on revealing almost anything that reflects badly on the war criminals of the Chimpy Administration. Even when he authorized the release of Chimpy's torture memos, Obama made sure to promise that he wasn't prosecuting anyone.

Where's that whole "change you can believe in" thing Obama talked about? Where's the Constitutional law scholar who was going to restore our rights and freedoms and retrieve our Constitution from the shit-basket Chimpy threw it into? Where's the guy who was going to end these stupid wars, bring our troops home, and stop dumping money into the war profiteers' bank accounts?

I love the way Obama speaks. I like the things he says, and how he says them. Compared to the near-daily fear I had that Chimpy would declare martial law any second, I feel pretty good with Barry Obama in the White House. I believe Obama when he says he's for the little guy, not the corporate behemoths.

But this whole war thing, and the war crimes of the Chimpy Administration -- on these counts, he's no nearer to bringing us justice than the war criminals themselves. And that makes me really really sad.

News from the world of hispanics

2009-05-12T06:49:00.001-07:00

My, my, it seems that we brownies are big topics in the news lately.

First, it turns out that Golden Empire Mortgage, Inc. and its owner, Howard D. Kootstra, are being charged by the Federal Trade Commission with "violating federal law by charging Hispanic consumers higher prices for mortgage loans than non-Hispanic white consumers – price disparities that cannot be explained by the applicants’ credit characteristics or underwriting risk." It's 2009, and these assholes are still pulling this shit? The press release doesn't say anything about other "minority" groups, just hispanics. I guess this outfit figured they couldn't cheat blacks, but why not cheat the browns? No one pays attention to us anyway, unless it's to demand that we be shot as we're trying to cross the US-Mexican border to steal all the jobs.

Second, newspapers all over the country are apparently reading our little brown minds and noting that "Hispanics See Stars Aligned on High Court." Who knew? I hadn't realized I was seeing any such stars, but if the WaPo says so, it must be true. I read the linked story and had to go all the way down to the eighth paragraph before finding out just who these star-struck hispanics are: "Hispanic legal groups" and "the Congressional Hispanic Caucus." I see.

You know, I have no doubt that these groups are pushing right now because Sonia Sotomayor's name has come up more than once as a potential nominee, and so her peeps--my brown people--are kicking it into overdrive to get her a seat on the high court. And why wouldn't they? The woman seems to have good qualifications. Still, I hate the way the media generalizes the actions of these political groups and says that "hispanics" are doing this--like it's ALL of us.

The media never generalize the actions of white people; it's just us people of color (and foreigners, of course) who are lumped into groups having one voice, that voice saying whatever the media decides we're trying to say.

Allergy help needed

2009-05-11T06:16:00.000-07:00

It seems I'm now officially an allergies sufferer. I had previously escaped such dangers as "Cedar Fever" in Austin and "Ragweed Mania" in Dallas, but apparently "Pennsylvania Pollen" is now kicking my ass. I'm all stuffy, my throat is almost swollen shut, my sinuses feel they're underwater, and I'm tired all the time. My eyes water for no reason, and they burn and itch like I've stayed up too late for weeks at a time. This blows!

I've been using my new Neti Pot religiously, and that has helped. I've also tried Zyrtec allergy medicine, but apparently my little histamine receptors are laughing at the weak Zyrtec molecules. I slept a lot this weekend, and that certainly helped me feel better, but most of the sleep was Benadryl-induced, so I'm now all balloony-headed too.

I'll take any suggestions as to how to rid myself of these symptoms!

...Oh sorry -- just fell asleep at my desk again...

Moron-palooza: coming soon to an alternate reality near you

2009-05-05T07:19:00.000-07:00

I saw a billboard for this "event" while driving home from Cape May on Sunday. Don't you wanna go? I mean, look at all the cool kids who go:

See? They have (counterclockwise from left) cute jock-looking guys, cute punky-looking chicks, serious and normal-looking (and still cute) girls, cute and kinda gay-looking but CERTAINLY NOT GAY! boys, and cool cute chicks in shades! I'm sure this is an absolutely random sampling of the cool kids who want you to come and talk about Jeebus and be cool with them!

And check out the oh-so-cool bands, full of hip and creative people!
Sooooo moody and cool! And I think that might be a born-again George Michael, third pic down! Wow!

You too can spread the word about Creationism and how AWESOME it is to be all Jeebus-y and stuff! And remember: "Plan on joining us. It will be the highlight of your summer, maybe your life! ™"